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Friday,November 27,2020 11:19 AM

What happened to chivalry?

By Carol Kasujja

Added 27th October 2016 11:42 AM

Nalukwata notes that today’s young men have no exemplary figures they look up to, if a man sends you flowers these days, he will be expecting sex the following day or that very day in the evening.

What happened to chivalry?

Nalukwata notes that today’s young men have no exemplary figures they look up to, if a man sends you flowers these days, he will be expecting sex the following day or that very day in the evening.

There was a time when men tied a dozen red roses, gave away sweet and mouth-watering chocolate bars in cute red boxes. Paid for meals, kept time, Opened doors for ladies, made efforts to please the woman, they would ask you out on a real date, they would take time and write sweet letters. What happened to those old days?

Suzan Nalukwata says that today's men do not have respect for women.

"I once boarded a pioneer bus, and when I got inside all seats were taken so I had to stand, In my heart I knew that maybe a man would leave his seat for me but it never happened. Men do not have respect for women and they do not care," said Nalukwata.

Nalukwata notes that today's young men have no exemplary figures they look up to,  if a man sends you flowers these days, he will be expecting sex the following day or that very day in the evening. Men these days can grab a woman behind while passing them.

"I stopped going to some bars and shopping areas like Owino because the men in those places have no respect for women. Instead of asking you, they just grab your breast or bum. I think aunts and uncles are not doing a good job when it comes to grooming boys," she said.

Linda Ssekamanya also says that today's chivalry only appears in movies.

"I love it when I see old couples hold hands in public, married folks who aren't afraid to act young and in love, long-time pairs who never get tired of making each other feel grand. Everybody wants to feel special, wants to be treated with sincere adoration. But these days it is rare to see such acts, I blame technology. People have found ways to take the easy way out in everything they do. Everything became very easy. Everything now has a shortcut,"

However Colin Kibirige says that it is dead because men do not see any reason why they should be nice to women who are not nice to them.

"I have a friend who treated this girl so nice but the girl took it for granted. She thought the guy was just desperate for her. She never ever returned the special care from that story I learnt not to exaggerate women.

Kibirige says that they are so many men ou there who are nice but they do not know  those things of chivalry. If a girls still consider such things, they will remain single forever.

Isa Katende says that when you treat a girl nicely, they take you for granted.

"Why do you think girls date bad men who have no idea about chivalry, chivalry died what matters these days is money. Women love money more than opening doors for them," said katende.

How to be a real man

Offer your arm when walking with your date. This is a gentlemanly act and it is also one guaranteed to help your date when she's walking on uneven ground in her high heels. While it is an intimate act, it is perfectly acceptable for a gentleman and means nothing more than being respectful. Always walk alongside a woman when walking down stairs, not behind her.

Be prepared to pay for you and your date's meals. If she offers to pay, kindly refuse. Remind her that you are on a date and it is your pleasure to take the bill. There is a lot of confusion about this aspect of a date but a gentleman is never confused; a gentleman simply gets on with paying.

Help your date to her chair before you sit down. This may seem odd because it doesn't happen very often these days, but by pulling out the chair for your date so she can sit down first, this shows your date that you care about her interests before your own. It is also a very gentlemanly gesture liable to score you a big win in the manners stakes.

Open doors for your date. Men, this is chivalry 101. When walking out of any door, make sure you hold the door open for your date and let her walk out first. This will make your date feel special and respected. There's no need to do this with flamboyant gestures though; just do it subtly and thoughtfully.

Compliment your date. Women like reassurance when it comes to their appearance. A great way to make a positive first impression is by offering a compliment on your date's appearance. Be cautious though. Using clichéd pick-up lines and corny compliments would make most women sprint back to their apartments. Be careful not to come across as creepy. No girl likes to feel objectified. Keep the compliments light and innocent.

 

 

 

 

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