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Is it a must to have sex on Valentine's Day?
Culturally sex should be between married people, we do not expect unmarried people to have sex - Pastor Michael Kyazze
Valentine's Day is a day of love and many couples look forward to it every year. As is the norm, people are going to outdo themselves and express their love towards their
partners in a variety of ways.
To some lovers, they will imagine abandoning themselves to the throes of passion and enjoy the most mindblowing sex. And we all know how important sex is in a relationship.
But is it really a must to have sex on Valentine's Day? The trick of getting sex on Valentine's lies in meticulous planning and discussion on how you want to spend the day.
Plan for Valentine's Day
Elizabeth Masaba, a marriage counsellor, says you should discuss your Valentine's plans ahead of the day itself. Do not let stress, children and work make you forget about that special day.
"Do not make the mistake of going without intimacy on that day because Valentine's Day is associated with intimacy. If you miss sex on that day you would have missed points. People who know what today means are already prepared their minds for sex.
Missing sex on Valentine's is like missing it on your wedding day. Sex on such days means a lot, you create memories," Masaba says.
She also advises couples to talk about the Valentine's Day plan ahead of time, so that they decide where, how and what time one will be available for those intimate
Sex is not a must
Edith Mukisa, a counsellor with Bukedde newspaper, calls upon couples to stop setting standards for themselves when it comes to loving. She says couples should let their relationships be spontaneous.
She notes that it is not a must to have sex on Valentine's Day because you could be in your periods. "The same way it is not a must to get a gift on Christmas Day, is the same way sex should be treated on Valentine's Day. Sex is not a yardstick to love, do not use it as a must on Valentine's.
You might find that on that day your partner has problems or she is in her menstruation periods. People have just fi nished paying school fees, they are still thinking of how to go through February and that means they might not be interested in
sex. Sex starts in the mind," Mukisa says.
She calls upon couples not to go with the crowd by doing what others are doing
on that day. Instead, they should use the day to plan for the year ahead.
"The most important thing is love, other things, such as gifts and dinner, are just for showbiz. Do not wait for just a single day to have that great sex, you should make everyday Valentine's to avoid feeling pressure on that day," Mukisa adds.
Pastor Michael Kyazze of Omega Healing Centre, says according to the Bible, sex is sacred and is a consummation of love. Sex can bring a blessing or curse.
"Biblically and culturally, sex should be between married people. We do not expect unmarried people to have sex. Sex is not the final expression of love, Valentine's is about love, the most important thing is the strength of the relationship not the hype aboutsex," Kyazze says.
Avoid plastic love Kyazze notes that Valentine's Day should always begin with the heart
because sex without affection is worthless.
"Many plastic relationships are leaning on sex. Appreciation, character and personality are a greater expression of love than sex.
Personally, I will just be calm and enjoy the day," Kyazze notes.
For Emmanuel Kasirye, a family pastor at Mutundwe Miracle Centre, sex is not a must. He says some people are married but they no longer have stronger feelings for
each other, others are in long distance relationships. He advises that if Valentine's come and your wife is in her periods be patient.
"If you find out that your wife is in her periods on Valentine's Day, be patient and wait for her to be better," Kasirye says.
He also agrees with other counsellors that the state of mind is key to good sex.
"If you have issues in your relationship, you can use the day to mend your relationship. However, it does not necessarily mean that the main target is sex, you do not expect a wife who is mistreated, disrespected and always insulted to be prepared for sex.
Sit down and discuss for a better marriage in future," Kasirye says.