Discordant couple tips students on HIV

PIC: Margarat speaking the youth as her husband Ronald Rokonilooks on. (Credit: Geoffrey Mutegeki)

HEALTH

ARUA - Margaret Rokoni aged 54 and his husband Ronald Rokoni 61 have been married for the last 36 years.

The couple from Arua district is blessed with six children.

This is no ordinary thing since Rokoni is HIV positive while Akumi is negative.

Margaret and her husband have spent 20 years living together as discordant couples after Rokoni contracted HIV in 1998.

Discordant couples, is a condition where one of the partners is positive and the other negative.

Rokoni fell sick around May 1998. After two weeks of sickness, he had become too weak, developed diarrhea and fever. His wife decided to take him to hospital which he resisted at first.

He was later admitted at Arua Regional Referral Hospital. He was very weak that by the time of his admission, he was not even able to figure out what was going on around him. It was his wife that requested the nurses to carry out an HIV test.

"I asked the nurse about my husband's condition, she told me he needed prayers because he was very weak. I asked the nurse for a blood test but to start with me and later they tested my husband," Margaret says.

While she waited for the results, Margaret started praying for her husband. The results would come later and she was told she is negative and the husband was positive.

"It was not easy to believe when my husband was tested and found positive. I was shaking on his hospital bed. I asked God to strengthen me while I continued to pray for my husband to get better," Margaret says.

Rokoni remained on treatment under the care of her wife who would crash anti-retroviral (ARV) drugs and feed him using a spoon.

After two weeks of treatment, Rokoni was able to sit and started talking and was on a road to recovery. He now lives as a living testimony.

Keeping it safe

Students attending the workshop at Makerere University.(Credit: Geoffrey Mutegeki)

Whenever the couple is to engage in sex, they have to use condoms. If used well, they can be 100% secure of safety.

Margaret encourages the youth to use condoms.

"The desire to have sex is there and we always have it. But whenever we have it we use a condom because he wants me to be safe," Margaret says.

Margaret describes his husband as a well-behaved man who was forced by his relatives to get another woman to produce more children and ended up getting infected.

"That was the devils' work through the relatives. They made my husband make mistakes. But I thank God for this situation because we are using it to fight the scourge." Margaret says.

She encourages young people to remain principled and not succumb to peer pressure on relationship choices.

"You ought to be principled. Never listen to your friends or relatives who give you wrong advise on how to go about your relationship life," Margaret said.

Despite using a condom all the time, Margaret still tests negative and says she doesn't even know the number of times she has tested.

"You should always test before you decide to marry or have sex with your partner. 

"If your partner is living carelessly, leave them. But if you are already married and one of you gets infected help each other," Rokoni says.

He notes that he has been able to live for 20 years because of his supporting wife.

"She has been my savior for all this time. I would have died. But also drug adherence, good nutrition and having a family or someone who cares about you is very important," Rokoni says.

The couple was talking to students of Makerere University and Mulago School of Allied Health during a workshop organised by Global Health And HIVAIDS Initiative Uganda (GHAIND).

The workshop that took place last week was aimed at empowering youth with information, sensitising them on behavior change and leadership.

"I'm living because I take drugs every day. You're lucky that today there is a lot of information on HIV and drugs are available. But I'm very sad to see young people dying of HIV yet you have all the options to avoid it unlike us back then," Rokoni says.

As a discordant and person living positively, Rokoni says he should be the last person to get infected.

Taking a line from Philly Lutaya's song of Alone and Frightened; Today it's me
Tomorrow someone else; Rokoni believes the line needs to be changed today it's me, tomorrow must be no one.

"It hurts me to see young girls and boys of your age dying while you are our future. I don't want you to step on what I stepped on. It is fire," Rokoni says.

Being a discordant couple has however affected Rokoni's productivity. He is not able to do some of the work he used to do like cultivation. All the work has been taken over by the wife.

In the late 1980's when Rokoni was still a head teacher at Old Kampala Primary School, he lost eight teachers to the scourge. At the time Rokoni was infected, all her kids had been born.

John Okiror, the director GHAIND urged the youth to take the advice from the couple and focus on preventing HIV.

"When you are living positive it is better you come out. If you want to realise your potential you have to come out so that you can manage your life well," Okiror says.

Joseph Kimbugwe, a student of Makerere says, he was impressed by Margaret's commitment to stay with her husbanda and the couple's ability to use condoms for 20 years.

"As youth, this is a lesson to us, we need to be principled and say no to HIV/AIDS.

I have learnt a lot from the couple and believe my colleagues have also picked something," Kimbugwe says.

Uganda Population HIV Assessment (UPHIA) indicates that the total number of adults and children of all ages living with HIV in Uganda is estimated to be approximately 1.3 million.

The 2016 UPHIA indicated a fall in HIV national prevalence at 6% compared to 7.3% according to the 2011 Uganda AIDS Indicator Survey. This indicates that Uganda has made significant progress in the national HIV response