She did not challenge my decision to join priesthood

The Rev. Eng. Emmanuel Mwesigwa, is the chaplain of St. Kakumba Church at Kyambogo University. He and his wife, Pamela Nangobi Mwesigwa, have been married for six years. They told Matthias Mazinga how the power of music brought them together.

Rev. Emmanuel Mwesigwa

After completing my civil engineering course at Makerere University in 2005, I was invited to St. John’s Church of Uganda, Kamwokya, to train their musical groups. That is where I met Pamela, who was a praise and worship team leader. As we practiced, I developed irresistible passion for her.

Through our interaction, I found her to be down-to-earth. She was not like those girls who expect heaven on earth. She was calm, disciplined and not jumpy. Needless to say, she was also very beautiful. I realised she was my ideal woman. When I proposed to her, she did not respond immediately, but accepted after about three weeks.

I love Pamela because she totally committed herself to me. We worked on our marriage together. After our wedding, I joined priesthood, but she did not challenge my decision, even after her friends told her that priests were poor and never available.

To Pamela, love matters much more than money. And where there is marital harmony, there is God’s providence. I have seen God’s providence in our lives. I have managed to meet my family responsibilities and also help the needy. Sometimes I do not even know where the money comes from.

Pamela Mwesigwa

I first met my husband at St. John’s Church of Uganda, Kamwokya, in 2005. Emma had come to train the choir and his presence excited us. For some years, we had not had a keyboard player, but he played the piano and guitar with great skill. Emma could read music and I found that fascinating. He was also sociable, which helped him make friends with every choir member. Of all the members, I became closest to him because we shared the leadership role.

The friendship developed when he recruited me into his Mwemat Band. We performed at church and at social gatherings like baptism parties. Eventually, we developed intimacy. He would accompany me home after rehearsals and before leaving, he would say, “Pamela, have a good night. God bless you. I love you.” At first, I thought  this was a casual statement, devoid of any deep intentions. I would also respond: “Oh thank you. I love you, too. God bless you, too.

One day, as he bid me good night, he proposed to me. I was surprised because all along I did not know he had feelings for me. So, I asked him to give me some time to think about it. He continued accompanying me home and every time, he would ask about my response to his proposal.

Eventually, I answered in the affi rmative, saying: “Let’s give it a try.” He was very happy and hugged me passionately. Soon, we started going out, praying and visiting relatives together. After a year of dating, we wed at St. Francis Chapel, Makerere University.

I have no regrets about marrying Emma. He is a caring and loving husband. Right from courtship, he promised to be there for me and, he has not gone back to his word. On joining priesthood, I knew Emma would not be affluent, but I had confidence in God’s providence and this has come to pass. We have constructed a house and bought a car.

God has also blessed us with three beautiful children; Angel Gloria Ainembabazi, Aleph Bamwenda and Abigail Vivian Mwesigwa. The only challenge I have faced in our marriage is moving whenever my husband gets a transfer. It is not easy adjusting to the new environment and sometimes our property is damaged during transit.

Giving up work

After graduating at Makerere University in 2005, I got a job with the National Social Security Fund, where I earned some good money. But I gave up the job to take care of my family. Some of my friends called me crazy, but I stood my ground. I would like to form the character of my children up to the stage when they can speak out for themselves.

Money is not everything. It will not do me any good to have a lot of money when my children are ‘spoilt’. Currently, my husband is the chaplain of Kyambogo University and all eyes are on him and his family. If our children got “spoilt”, the sheep would say, “are these the chaplain’s children?” Eventually, the sheep will not take their shepherd’s word seriously. So, let my husband do his ministry, as I do my mine.