Why you should avoid pornography at all costs

 

No one suspected anything was amiss, while the teenager was slowly sinking into pornography addiction. It was not until Katusiime tried to commit suicide last month that her family learnt the truth. 

 

She had also started a sexual relationship with the neighbour’s gateman as the addiction progressed. When her family searched Katusiime’s bedroom after the suicide attempt, they found a lot of pornographic movies and the Internet history searches on her mother’s laptop showed that she spent almost all her time online watching pornographic movies and pictures. 

 

Pornography harms children. Therefore, parents need to educate their children, especially teenagers, on the dangers of consuming pornography. Often, the addiction starts slowly and progresses to where one is always preoccupied with the vice. 

 

“The vice entraps you and can be as addictive as heroin or smoking,” experts say. 

According to Gaston Byamugisha, a counselling psychologist at Kyambogo University, addiction to pornography develops through a number of stages. 

 

“It progresses from soft pornography of reading text describing sexual feelings and mild graphic images to hard pornography of graphic images of people engaging in sex. With time, the images are imprinted on the mind of whoever is consuming them, leading to addiction to pornography,” Byamugisha says.

 

Last year, media reports indicated that many students were addicted to narcotic drugs and pornography. Sadly, the adolescents in secondary schools and universities were finding it hard to quit their addiction.

 

According to research, pornography confuses a child, making them behave in a queer manner or being preoccupied with sex and unable to concentrate. 

 

It can also lead to symptoms associated with a number of mental health disorders, including depression. This can have devastating effects if it is not diagnosed early and treated properly. For many youth, who may be suicidal, pornography may be one of the root causes, according to recent research by the University of New Hampshire. 

 

Research has also shown that watching a lot of pornographic material can lead children into fornication, incest and criminal activities like rape and violence.  

 

A survey conducted by the University of New Hampshire in 2005 indicated that 42% of Internet users aged between 10 and 17 years said they had watched online pornography in the preceding year.

 

“Although we would like to think otherwise, a large number of children in Uganda are also exposed to pornography at an early age. 

 

“This is more than just a pornographic pop-up or email that a child might come across, it involves viewing films of explicit sex, regularly looking through pornographic magazines or viewing pornographic television and graphic Internet pictures,” Stephen Langa, the executive director of Family Life Network, a local NGO.

 

In a recent survey by the University of Plymouth and the UK’s Safer Internet Centre, involving 16-24 year-olds, it was found out that one in three people admitted that pornography had affected their relationships.

 

The survey showed that there was a 34% increase in the number of calls from teenagers distressed by sexual images they had viewed online in the past year.

 

Langa equates pornography to a bush fire, destroying students in schools. He adds that he occasionally receives parents, seeking help for their children, who are addicted to pornography. He cites a recent case of a young boy, who approached him during one of his school visits. 

 

“The boy confessed to be a pornography addict, telling me how he got involved with prostitutes, who infected him with HIV months later,” he says.

 

Langa advises parents to always take interest in what their children are watching.

 

Ruth Ssenyonyi, a counsellor at the Bank of Uganda, notes that pornography has become a serious problem today because porn material can be accessed easily. Ssenyonyi says with pornography, images become imprinted on the children’s minds. 

 

“This may make the children to start indulging in sexual behaviour. This has, consequently, increased the rate of defilement and sexual molestation and violence,” she explains.

 

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Exposure to pornography can be through peers, parents or parents of friends, unsupervised and unfiltered Internet use at home or at friends’ homes. 

 

It can also be through watching x-rated television shows or through older siblings. 

Pornography, as well as exposure to sexual innuendo in movies for pre-teens, confuses them. Often, they have no one, except their equally-confused peers, that they can talk to about the practice, experts note. 

 

Joseph Musaalo, a counselling psychologist at Uganda Christian University, Mukono, says watching pornography breeds disrespect in children. 

 

He says it also leads to loss of interest in meaningful sexual relationships later in life and is a root cause of deviant sexual behaviour.

 

Byamugisha notes that watching pornographic materials is strongly linked to crimes like serial murders. 

“Some pornographic movies show rapists, and the children think this is normal. 

 

“After watching such movies, they get wild and want to forcefully sleep with people of the opposite sex. Since this ends up in rape, they kill their victims to cover up the rape,” 

 

Musaalo notes that because pornography affects a child’s concentration in class, it leads to poor academic performance. 

 

“Consuming pornography also destroys the child’s values and morals. It also creates fear, guilt and shame among the affected peers. The child does not feel free because he thinks people know the wrong things he or she is doing,” Musaalo says.

 

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Stephen Langa, the executive director of Family Life Network, a local NGO, says identifying a child who is consuming pornography is difficult because, just like drug addicts, they are secretive.

 

However, Langa notes that the common indicator is behavioral change. Below are signs that your child could be consuming pornography:

 

They surfing the Internet secretly. 

 

A child consuming pornography appears withdrawn and is always locked up in the bedroom, watching porn movies and x-rated books and magazines. The children borrow these materials secretly. When an adult enters their rooms, they hide the DVDs or switch off television and change the Internet site. When asked what they are watching, they never have a straight answer.

 

They prefer to watch television or use the computer when everybody else is asleep. 

 

They play music on high volume to disguise the pornography movie.

 

They are unruly and are not willing to take up any advice concerning sex and sexuality.

 

They are keen and quick to pick and hide any pornographic material.

 

They start involving in immoral acts like having sexual intercourse with siblings.

 

Loss of concentration, especially in class because of the play back episodes in their mind.

 

They get into impulsive masturbation. Such children keep running off to the toilet to masturbate in the middle of activities, which consequently affects their academic performance.

 

 

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Parents should set up blocking software or web filtering tool on their children’s computer. The software blocks any porn-related site from popping up.

 

Have TV programming password locks to limit the content children can view on television.

 

Keep television sets and computers in the most-used rooms in the home not in a bedroom or private places.

 

If you are not sure of the local cinema hall’s movies, do not allow your children to go there.

 

Monitor your child’s phone to find out what they are surfing on the Internet. Parents should buy monitoring software from Internet service providers that is connected on their children’s mobile phones.

 

Know your children’s friends. 

 

Outlaw pornographic materials like magazines, VCDs or DVDs.

 

No downloads of porn pictures should be allowed at home.

 

Parents must be friendly to their children as this helps them know what their children are doing.

 

Depending on the age, parents should check their children’s e-mail messages because some pornographic links can easily be sent to their mail box.

 

Keep away from porn magazines or DVDs. Do not buy such items. In case some content in magazines or movies is explicit, keep such items out of the reach of children.

 

Educate your children about the adverse effects of exposure to pornography.

 

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SCHOOLS have broken off for the longest holiday on the school calendar. It has been a year with short intermittent holidays.

 

This being the longest holiday and a festive season, parents, guardians and students themselves have got to be extra careful and committed to having the best holiday, with no regrets.

 

Holidays are not times to assume freedom to live your life recklessly. Remember, you are accountable for every decision you make. Good work is credited, and mediocrity is punished.

 

Be careful not to encounter bad predicaments like defilement, fornication, hooliganism, idleness, violence and drug abuse. There are consequences like HIV, unwanted pregnancies and drug addictions that follow such predicaments.

 

In many cases students have been involved in incidences were they have been hurt in violent activities, killed or even imprisoned.

 

Indiscipline is one reasons why the number of school drop-outs is increasing. Uganda, for a record, has the highest school dropout rate in East Africa, according to a report released by the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organisation.

 

Kenya has a lower drop outs rate compared to Uganda, but higher than that of Tanzania. Uganda still has the lowest proportion of children staying in school up to Primary Seven. A follow-up of every 100 pupils who joined Primary One in 1999, showed that only 25 reached Primary Seven in 2006.

 

In Kenya, 84% of pupils reached Primary Seven. Tanzania stood at 81% and Rwanda at 74%. It is everyones’ responsibility and the community, to ensure that no child drops out of school just because the December holiday was mishandled.

 

What can parents and schools do to protect children from pornography. 

Send your response to: mwalimu@newvision.co.ug 

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