Teach them good manners early

 

No one is born with good manners. We all learn these in the families or environment we are raised in. Those who do not learn good manners are difficult to relate with. 

 

That’s why children should be taught good manners as well as the four golden words and be encouraged to apply them generously. These words, which include ‘I’m sorry’, ‘forgive me’, ‘please’ and ‘excuse me’, make a difference in interpersonal relationships. However, few people use them at the right time. Oftentimes they are said when the damage has already been done. 

 

As an employer sometimes I’m taken aback by adults who cannot say sorry or who have to be coerced into admitting they were in the wrong and apologise for it. Unfortunately, for many such adults by the time they realise the folly of their ways, they have probably offended their employers too many times and have probably lost their jobs. 

 

The roots of such behaviour are in one’s childhood where they are not taught to be sensitive to other people’s feelings. If children are taught to respect others, they will offend them less. 

 

Ironically, human nature is averse to correction or to admit being in the wrong. I recently had a fight with my three-year-old Asiphiwe for disrespecting a visitor. Any attempt to get her to apologise fell on deaf ears. After spanking her, she finally admitted to the mistake and had to call the offended party and apologise. 

 

Every day presents opportunities to teach our children good manners. Children should not only be taught to apologise to people outside the home, but also to their siblings, parents and other adults they offend. Likewise adults too should do the same.