Valentine’s Day: Unleash your love
Feb 12, 2010
NOT sure about what to do this Valentine’s Day? Our resident counsellor, HILARY BAINEMIGISHA, takes you through the menu.
NOT sure about what to do this Valentine’s Day? Our resident counsellor, HILARY BAINEMIGISHA, takes you through the menu.
The Doctor of Love says your package depends on your stage of love
Valentine’s is the day to celebrate and enjoy love. Regardless of your age, social status orbank balance, you can make the best of the day. Just work out what suits both of you and ignite the spark in your relationship
Valentine’s Day is for lovers. Whether you are searching or not, heart-broken or healing, widowed or separated, this is not a day of mourning. If your soul yearns for the partner you do not have, use past memories to call to mind what you are missing. Do not grab any partner just because it is Valentine’s. When you love for the wrong reason, you break up soon after for the right reason.
Suggested venue: Home comfort
Suggested evening activity: Watching a movie, soccer or hang out with friends
LOVERS FOR SIX MONTHS
Love for you still means everything from oxygen to food. Maybe the temptation to dive into the romance is greater than that faced by the managers of NSSF funds. Well, if abstinence has been in your constitution, this is NOT an opportunity to break the vows. Share your romantic love without breaking the rules. There is a reason why abstinence was your value; resist all temptation. You now know you can have a fulfilling romantic life without sex. Waiting is more fun and exciting, don’t you think so?
Suggested venue: Outdoor public fun where temptation is curtailed
Suggested evening activity: Beach, restaurant or fellowship
ENGAGED TO MARRY
Remember your planned honeymoon? This is an opportunity to start practising. This is a stage where the motivation to make it work is at its peak. Test the waters in the context of your philosophy in love. If you are abstaining until marriage, don’t lose it minutes away from the finishing line. It is an opportunity to bond, show your true colours and start adjusting to your partner. It calls for an end to inward selfishness, which you won’t need once you are married. Remember to make it frugal; you will need the money for the wedding.
Suggested venue: Home comfort, outdoor fun, visiting sites
Suggested evening activity: Cooking together, watch a movie at home, beach, restaurant or discoÂ
LOVERS WITH PROBLEMS
Am I not describing almost everyone? How difficult it is to bond and adjust to a person whose genes, upbringing, education and life expectations are different! But behold, Valentines’ day: Your chance to make up, declare a ceasefire and bring out your ideal self for sharing. That is your chance to discover the person behind the frowns, the criticising face and the quarrelsome character. Put on a user-friendly nature and for 24 hours pretend you are being paid for being nice to each other. Forget the past, the criticism, the anger and see if you won’t find the partner, who is increasingly becoming your burden, a better place to be.
Suggested venue: Away from home
Suggested evening activity: Movie, theatre, beach, disco, restaurant where the public will help you to keep up the loving act
JUST MARRIED
You probably are still being nice to each other and avoiding confrontation that will cause clashes. Your motivation to make it work is at its highest and Valentine’s Day is what you need. The challenge may be to make it special from the other romance-filled days of your marriage. Be innovative. It is still possible to make it different. Enjoy it while it lasts
Suggested venue: Home, cinema, lovers’ joints
Suggested evening activity: Watching a movie in bed, cooking together, hanging out in quiet places, hotel away from home, sex.
MARRIED FOR LONG
You have probably crossed the delicate line where the temptation to take each other for granted starts. You have concluded that you cannot change your partner and have to live with some of their inconveniencing ways for the rest of your life. Arguments make up a big part of your verbal communication and your defence mechanism has evolved to a stage where you are immune to Darling’s upsetting behaviour.
Suggested venue: Outdoor fun, theatre
Suggested evening activity: Watching a play together away from the children or distraction, hotel romance makes a welcome change from home.
THE REST
If by any chance you don’t find yourself in the categories above, relax; you do not exist: You have deceived yourself so far but in reality, you are a nonexistent human being; a ghost commonly found in voting registers, UPE, health centres and CHOGM accountability figures.
JUST MET LOVERS
Is this your first Valentine’s? What an opportunity to display your hot emotions for each other. Unleash your abilities without fear or favour but keep an eye out for mistakes to avoid them in future. Remember, no sex. You have just met and rushing it will cause a disintegration of many things including your heart. If you are the type who gets a bitter taste when you give a gift, then do not fall in love after November. How will you account for your being a miser from Christmas, through New Year’s Day and Valentine’s to Easter? But if you started the affair, shape up or ship out.
Suggested venue: Cinema or theatre
Suggested evening activity: Joint leisure like watching a play, going to the cinema or beach fun. Public leisure is better to keep you away from crossing the line
The Doctor of Love says your package depends on your stage of love
Valentine’s is the day to celebrate and enjoy love. Regardless of your age, social status orbank balance, you can make the best of the day. Just work out what suits both of you and ignite the spark in your relationship
Valentine’s Day is for lovers. Whether you are searching or not, heart-broken or healing, widowed or separated, this is not a day of mourning. If your soul yearns for the partner you do not have, use past memories to call to mind what you are missing. Do not grab any partner just because it is Valentine’s. When you love for the wrong reason, you break up soon after for the right reason.
Suggested venue: Home comfort
Suggested evening activity: Watching a movie, soccer or hang out with friends
LOVERS FOR SIX MONTHS
Love for you still means everything from oxygen to food. Maybe the temptation to dive into the romance is greater than that faced by the managers of NSSF funds. Well, if abstinence has been in your constitution, this is NOT an opportunity to break the vows. Share your romantic love without breaking the rules. There is a reason why abstinence was your value; resist all temptation. You now know you can have a fulfilling romantic life without sex. Waiting is more fun and exciting, don’t you think so?
Suggested venue: Outdoor public fun where temptation is curtailed
Suggested evening activity: Beach, restaurant or fellowship
ENGAGED TO MARRY
Remember your planned honeymoon? This is an opportunity to start practising. This is a stage where the motivation to make it work is at its peak. Test the waters in the context of your philosophy in love. If you are abstaining until marriage, don’t lose it minutes away from the finishing line. It is an opportunity to bond, show your true colours and start adjusting to your partner. It calls for an end to inward selfishness, which you won’t need once you are married. Remember to make it frugal; you will need the money for the wedding.
Suggested venue: Home comfort, outdoor fun, visiting sites
Suggested evening activity: Cooking together, watch a movie at home, beach, restaurant or discoÂ
LOVERS WITH PROBLEMS
Am I not describing almost everyone? How difficult it is to bond and adjust to a person whose genes, upbringing, education and life expectations are different! But behold, Valentines’ day: Your chance to make up, declare a ceasefire and bring out your ideal self for sharing. That is your chance to discover the person behind the frowns, the criticising face and the quarrelsome character. Put on a user-friendly nature and for 24 hours pretend you are being paid for being nice to each other. Forget the past, the criticism, the anger and see if you won’t find the partner, who is increasingly becoming your burden, a better place to be.
Suggested venue: Away from home
Suggested evening activity: Movie, theatre, beach, disco, restaurant where the public will help you to keep up the loving act
JUST MARRIED
You probably are still being nice to each other and avoiding confrontation that will cause clashes. Your motivation to make it work is at its highest and Valentine’s Day is what you need. The challenge may be to make it special from the other romance-filled days of your marriage. Be innovative. It is still possible to make it different. Enjoy it while it lasts
Suggested venue: Home, cinema, lovers’ joints
Suggested evening activity: Watching a movie in bed, cooking together, hanging out in quiet places, hotel away from home, sex.
MARRIED FOR LONG
You have probably crossed the delicate line where the temptation to take each other for granted starts. You have concluded that you cannot change your partner and have to live with some of their inconveniencing ways for the rest of your life. Arguments make up a big part of your verbal communication and your defence mechanism has evolved to a stage where you are immune to Darling’s upsetting behaviour.
Suggested venue: Outdoor fun, theatre
Suggested evening activity: Watching a play together away from the children or distraction, hotel romance makes a welcome change from home.
THE REST
If by any chance you don’t find yourself in the categories above, relax; you do not exist: You have deceived yourself so far but in reality, you are a nonexistent human being; a ghost commonly found in voting registers, UPE, health centres and CHOGM accountability figures.
JUST MET LOVERS
Is this your first Valentine’s? What an opportunity to display your hot emotions for each other. Unleash your abilities without fear or favour but keep an eye out for mistakes to avoid them in future. Remember, no sex. You have just met and rushing it will cause a disintegration of many things including your heart. If you are the type who gets a bitter taste when you give a gift, then do not fall in love after November. How will you account for your being a miser from Christmas, through New Year’s Day and Valentine’s to Easter? But if you started the affair, shape up or ship out.
Suggested venue: Cinema or theatre
Suggested evening activity: Joint leisure like watching a play, going to the cinema or beach fun. Public leisure is better to keep you away from crossing the line