Men look out for each other
Oct 01, 2010
SOME say, men are from Mars; women are from Venus. but as one wise man said, that is just nonsense. We are all from earth, so you best learn to deal with it. Regardless, men have behavior that sometimes baffle us.
By Anne Kirya
SOME say, men are from Mars; women are from Venus. but as one wise man said, that is just nonsense. We are all from earth, so you best learn to deal with it. Regardless, men have behavior that sometimes baffle us.
They have rules that women may simply overlook, yet they take them seriously, with a “don’t divulge even under pain of death†attitude.
These rules/codes of conduct are even stricter when it comes to relationships.
Never date your friend’s sister
For girls, it would actually be exciting if your best friend dated your brother, but for guys, such behavior is unforgivable.
According to Loukman, it just feels bad knowing anyone is dating your sister, and it is even worse when the guy is your friend.
“I mean I’m a guy, and I know what guys are like. I do not think I can be friends with someone who is going out with my sister,†he says. “Imagine you hurt my sister? I can’t honestly hang with you knowing my sister is heart broken because of you.â€
That makes sense right? In fact if the reason is only because guys are looking out for their sisters then well and good.
I saw her first.
Linda was good friends with this guy until she met his friend, whom she liked a lot more than she did him. But because he was not making a move after so many months of clear intimacy and stolen kisses here and there, she went and did some research. “ I thought he didn’t even like me,†she says. It turns out that since the first guy had introduced her to the group, it was accepted that she was ‘his gal’. This law does not apply to any other area of life thank God.
Having set eyes on Linda first, it was like he had pitched his own little flag on her mountain. And everyone else accepted it as such, with no questions asked.
No telling his wife if he cheats
“What business is it of mine what he is doing to his wife?†Peter asks when I ask him. In fact, guys whose friends cheat are very careful not to introduce their girlfriends to these shady men friends, because the girlfriends are more likely to report. “Once my girlfriend threatened to tell my friend’s wife that her husband was cheating, even though my girlfriend and his wife were just acquaintances,†Sam Busi says.
Isaac says it is tricky but “you are reporting as who? Is she your sister?†and that is why the “do not date my sister†rule comes in handy. If she was your sister then you would have to go on and break the guy’s legs.
He says women, because they are women, will always divulge their sources “then my boy will hate me and all for what?†he asks. He says this rule can also apply both ways. If it is the wife cheating, there are few men who would tell their friends about it, even if they had evidence. Now if that is not cowardice, what is?
Bros first
Now this is at least relevant and I wish girls too could adopt this behavior. His friends are more important than your drama, and sometimes, more important than you, period. Maybe that is why guys are better at keeping their friends longer than us girls.
In fact, one lady tells of how her ex-boyfriend’s friend was hitting on her. She tried to tell him and he broke up with her! Well of course he didn’t dump her immediately, but it wasn’t long before it happened.
Later when they were friends again he told her that it did not matter whether it was true or false, keeping his friend was more important to him (he did not say it like that but it was implied).
Thou shall not sleep with a friend’s ex
This rule is like that game we used to play when we were selfish little kids. Once you touched a toy, it was yours forever, even when you got tired of it. Brian does not mind, as long he is over her, but he admits that some “sensitive†guys take offence. Reversely, some enjoy the ego boost, saying: “ I saw her first and he is taking left overs,†says a gentleman who would rather not be named.
SOME say, men are from Mars; women are from Venus. but as one wise man said, that is just nonsense. We are all from earth, so you best learn to deal with it. Regardless, men have behavior that sometimes baffle us.
They have rules that women may simply overlook, yet they take them seriously, with a “don’t divulge even under pain of death†attitude.
These rules/codes of conduct are even stricter when it comes to relationships.
Never date your friend’s sister
For girls, it would actually be exciting if your best friend dated your brother, but for guys, such behavior is unforgivable.
According to Loukman, it just feels bad knowing anyone is dating your sister, and it is even worse when the guy is your friend.
“I mean I’m a guy, and I know what guys are like. I do not think I can be friends with someone who is going out with my sister,†he says. “Imagine you hurt my sister? I can’t honestly hang with you knowing my sister is heart broken because of you.â€
That makes sense right? In fact if the reason is only because guys are looking out for their sisters then well and good.
I saw her first.
Linda was good friends with this guy until she met his friend, whom she liked a lot more than she did him. But because he was not making a move after so many months of clear intimacy and stolen kisses here and there, she went and did some research. “ I thought he didn’t even like me,†she says. It turns out that since the first guy had introduced her to the group, it was accepted that she was ‘his gal’. This law does not apply to any other area of life thank God.
Having set eyes on Linda first, it was like he had pitched his own little flag on her mountain. And everyone else accepted it as such, with no questions asked.
No telling his wife if he cheats
“What business is it of mine what he is doing to his wife?†Peter asks when I ask him. In fact, guys whose friends cheat are very careful not to introduce their girlfriends to these shady men friends, because the girlfriends are more likely to report. “Once my girlfriend threatened to tell my friend’s wife that her husband was cheating, even though my girlfriend and his wife were just acquaintances,†Sam Busi says.
Isaac says it is tricky but “you are reporting as who? Is she your sister?†and that is why the “do not date my sister†rule comes in handy. If she was your sister then you would have to go on and break the guy’s legs.
He says women, because they are women, will always divulge their sources “then my boy will hate me and all for what?†he asks. He says this rule can also apply both ways. If it is the wife cheating, there are few men who would tell their friends about it, even if they had evidence. Now if that is not cowardice, what is?
Bros first
Now this is at least relevant and I wish girls too could adopt this behavior. His friends are more important than your drama, and sometimes, more important than you, period. Maybe that is why guys are better at keeping their friends longer than us girls.
In fact, one lady tells of how her ex-boyfriend’s friend was hitting on her. She tried to tell him and he broke up with her! Well of course he didn’t dump her immediately, but it wasn’t long before it happened.
Later when they were friends again he told her that it did not matter whether it was true or false, keeping his friend was more important to him (he did not say it like that but it was implied).
Thou shall not sleep with a friend’s ex
This rule is like that game we used to play when we were selfish little kids. Once you touched a toy, it was yours forever, even when you got tired of it. Brian does not mind, as long he is over her, but he admits that some “sensitive†guys take offence. Reversely, some enjoy the ego boost, saying: “ I saw her first and he is taking left overs,†says a gentleman who would rather not be named.