The three foolish men of X-mas

Dec 22, 2010

THE Christmas period brings the best of the Bible out of me. You don’t believe me? OK, forget what the pastor tells you and cast your net the other side of the boat.

By Hilary Bainemigisha

THE Christmas period brings the best of the Bible out of me. You don’t believe me? OK, forget what the pastor tells you and cast your net the other side of the boat.

You all know the story of the three wise men of Christmas, don’t you?

Elsewhere, when the five wise virgins are mentioned, their five foolish colleagues are too. Remember the wise Lazarus? He had a foolish rich neighbour too.

Then the foolish Pharisee at the temple and his wise sinner friend. So, I ask: if there are the three wise men of Bethlehem, shouldn’t there be their foolish colleagues?

In case they were omitted, here is the list. Remember the Bible and I have different standards. We already don’t agree on the Magi, who I insist must be Movement people who stole the primaries.

If I was the Bible, I would have voted for Simeon, the old man who, after seeing Jesus, did not ask God for another rap.

How many of our politicians, having seen petroleum in Bunyoro, would not ask for another term?

Then there is the owner of the kraal where Jesus was born. He did not chase the strangers away from his cows, did he?

Lastly, there is you the reader, who believes what you read without question.

That said, ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the three foolish men of the Christmas story according to my relationship marking scheme.

Number one is: Joseph, my namesake

The admirable man agreed to marry a woman who got pregnant before they even ‘met’. He agreed to raise a kid that was not his and had to run to exile in Egypt for fear that neighbours would start calculating the pregnancy against the marriage date.

I know this world would be a better place if all men took up Joseph’s character. But along these shores, Joseph hardly defines today’s real man. That is probably why he is not as venerated as his wife or son. Even when he died, no one noticed. Yet in God’s book, he is a saint of no ordinary kind. One who sacrificed his self esteem to play along in God’s salvation plan. I love being saint but I would pray to God to let Joseph’s cup pass.

Number two: The shepherds
These guys would leave their wives in bed to go watching their flock against thieves and wild animals. But, that night, they absconded as if flocks did not need a guard after all! Could they have planned to steal something from a colleague’s kraal only to find there stranded strangers and, in a fleeting innovation, start telling stories of a vision of an angel choir tearing the skies? How come no one else in town saw the torn sky or heard the choir? The only time I see sky visions no one else can see is when I am buried under alcohol and feeling like the president of the resistance movement. Maybe, just maybe …

But, again, the Bible’s standards are that different. Most of God’s people abandon their marriages, careers, possessions and duties to follow his mission. And in God’s dictionary, they rank high. In mine, they can’t even pass the primaries.

Number three is Herod
This man heard crowds praising the opposition and got scared. After being told a king was born, he immediately feared for his kingdom and killed all the babies that were born around that time. As if he expected to still be king 25 years from that date. He must have heard about and admired the dinosaur presidents of Africa. What is wrong with power that even when a day old looks like having a vision, it becomes a threat? And poor God; instead of striking Herod dead, He let the tyrant kill innocent babies and saved only His son! Everybody is equal, but some people are more equal than others.

The Bible, however, does not call these three foolish. They were all part of God’s plan. You too have or will once upon a time be part of God’s plan and will be called foolish for loving the girl you like, for marrying a poor chap instead of a richer alternative, for wedding instead of building first, and for etc instead of etc. God works through ways we call foolish and uses people society rarely esteems high.

In short, if it makes sense to you, don’t care about your social label of ‘foolish’. Just follow your heart.

A merry Christmas.


hbainemigisha@newvision.co.ug






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