How to handle a young child’s curious question
Jun 29, 2003
A mother recently shared with me the difficulties she was facing with handling her child’s questions. She pointed out that her child expected her to have ready answers for all questions put across to her
PARENTS’ CORNER
By Wagwau Jamesa
A mother recently shared with me the difficulties she was facing with handling her child’s questions. She pointed out that her child expected her to have ready answers for all questions put across to her.
“My five-year-old son bothers me with a barrage of questions: some of which do not have answers. How do I handle these questions without suppressing the child’s curiosity?†she wondered.
This is a dilemma faced by almost every parent during the first years of parenthood. Your child may confront you with all sorts of questions, some of which may include: “Why are leaves always green Dad or why is Mummy taller than you.â€
It is very clear that some of their questions are hard to answer and some have never been answered while some cannot be answered. Parents are troubled more for they think that every question asked by the child should be answered. Indeed young parents especially are often tempted to fabricate answers in an attempt to respond to the child’s questions.
This is because they would not like to betray the confidence, which their children have in them. Educational psychologists encourage parents and teachers to foster curiosity and encourage questioning in children as part of learning.
Peter Abelard in his book, Think Logically notes that the first key to wisdom is constant questioning. How then do you cope with these young fellows who subject you to a series of questions, expecting instant answers as if you are a professor of nature?
It may shock you to realise that not all questions asked by children require your answers. A child’s questions are often loaded with hidden meanings, which you may not easily discern at face value.
For example “How comes my aunt slept until she was kept in that piece of wood and covered with soil?†This question is loaded with fear and the child is endeavouring to find out.
“Will I also fail to wake up like my aunt if I go to sleep?†Maybe the fear expressed is beyond words. The following tips can help you discern what children mean with their questions:
I want to know the right answer.
I have asked to show interest.
I would like to discuss it further
I do not really mind what your answer is. I want your attention now!
Recommendations:
Admitting that you do not know is a healthy lesson for the child. Do not succumb to the child’s pressures by faking unrealistic answers.
Bear in mind that your response depends on the child’s age, the nature of the question, your relationship with the child and the needs of the moment.
You may tactfully roll the question back to the child to encourage productive thinking. Use words like, “What do you think or how can we find out?†Remember that an inquisitive mind is a fertile ground for learning. A child’s questions should be encouraged. You are the child’s first teacher therefore strive to lay a proper foundation.
jamesawagwau@yahoo.com
By Wagwau Jamesa
A mother recently shared with me the difficulties she was facing with handling her child’s questions. She pointed out that her child expected her to have ready answers for all questions put across to her.
“My five-year-old son bothers me with a barrage of questions: some of which do not have answers. How do I handle these questions without suppressing the child’s curiosity?†she wondered.
This is a dilemma faced by almost every parent during the first years of parenthood. Your child may confront you with all sorts of questions, some of which may include: “Why are leaves always green Dad or why is Mummy taller than you.â€
It is very clear that some of their questions are hard to answer and some have never been answered while some cannot be answered. Parents are troubled more for they think that every question asked by the child should be answered. Indeed young parents especially are often tempted to fabricate answers in an attempt to respond to the child’s questions.
This is because they would not like to betray the confidence, which their children have in them. Educational psychologists encourage parents and teachers to foster curiosity and encourage questioning in children as part of learning.
Peter Abelard in his book, Think Logically notes that the first key to wisdom is constant questioning. How then do you cope with these young fellows who subject you to a series of questions, expecting instant answers as if you are a professor of nature?
It may shock you to realise that not all questions asked by children require your answers. A child’s questions are often loaded with hidden meanings, which you may not easily discern at face value.
For example “How comes my aunt slept until she was kept in that piece of wood and covered with soil?†This question is loaded with fear and the child is endeavouring to find out.
“Will I also fail to wake up like my aunt if I go to sleep?†Maybe the fear expressed is beyond words. The following tips can help you discern what children mean with their questions:
Recommendations:
jamesawagwau@yahoo.com