My companion, the teddy

Sep 25, 2003

Maria ushers me into her bedroom. What a sight it is! A big bed covered in woolen blanket. Celine Dion is gazing at me from the Wall

By Joe Nam

Maria ushers me into her bedroom. What a sight it is! A big bed covered in woolen blanket. Celine Dion is gazing at me from the Wall. What Chance! Her sweet voice is crooning from the music system too.

“Meet Vanessa,” says Maria. Vanessa is sitting on the bed, her back on the wall. “Hello Vanessa, I say. But she is silent. Maria is meanwhile busying herself with the kettle. I take hold of Vanessa, cuddled her and tell her she is cute, but she does not answer. She cannot talk because she is a teddy bear.

When I step out into the moonlit night a half an hour later, feeling warm from a cup of Cocoa, It strikes me that there are silent occupants called teddy bears in almost every ladies room I have been to, in ladies halls of residence and hostels.

Weeks later, I am at the Sheraton Hotel packing lot. In drives a lady in a green car. She later tells me her name is Michel Mbabazi. There is another silent passenger at the back of her car. But she is more than a passenger, she is a counsellor too, her name is Sky.

“Whenever I am hurt and depressed, I tell Sky my problems. I always come with her in my car because I don’t like travelling alone,” she says. Michel, who is a software engineer, says she keeps other 299 teddy bears her parents bought her from childhood.

Ann Ampaire is an assistant lecturer at the Institute of Psychology in Makerere University. We are talking in her office when I notice there are three silent listeners to our conversation. I ask what they are for. “They are my friends, I just like them,” she says.

“It’s about the lady’s nurturing nature,” says Jacinta Nekesa, a Lecturer of Psychology. She says ladies care more about people, upbringing can encourage a love for dolls at an early age but it is more about their maternal instinct.

“Boys in that age want cars, that is when they begin stealing their parents cars. The boys want money but girls are more towards having friends.”

Another lecturer Paul Nyende, says teddy bear keeping is a culture that has developed especially in Makerere and other higher institution of learning.

“These girls want some one or something to care for, but the media and culture are also responsible for this phenomenon. If their roommate is having it, they will also want to keep it.

Psychologist agree that teddy bears and dolls can play an important role in people’s lives. It provides security and comfort. Teddies can be taken for babies, friends, counsellors and confidants among other roles.

It has the ability to unlock emotional floodgates and let repressed emotions to flow. It has a therapeutic effect on those who keep it.

It gives a sense of purpose, a sense of usefulness, it makes a person feel useful and bolsters self esteem. Having a doll can fulfill maternal (or paternal) hunger.

Having a doll can also rekindle positive memories and emotions of loving and being loved and needed. One owner said keeping teddy bears is a consolation, especially if one is an only child or has had traumatic experiences.

Teddy bears are normally given as presents. The price tag of teddy bears at shops in Kampala begin from sh20,000 onward. And for the girls, it is trendy to have the teddies.

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