THOU ShalT Be Cool On CamPus
Aug 13, 2009
You have probably heard the Fanta advert in which a young lady, whom I presume is a “campuser†(university student), is relating a dating experience with a guy to her girlfriends.
By Owen Wagabaza
You have probably heard the Fanta advert in which a young lady, whom I presume is a “campuser†(university student), is relating a dating experience with a guy to her girlfriends.
Apparently, everything he did –– from the shoes he wore, to the two “rolexes†(eggs rolled up in a chapati) he ordered, was so uncool. That was, of course, until he ordered the drink.
That advert is right on the money! On campus, being “cool†is the eleventh commandment! You either abide or risk being spurned.
Cool basically means trendy. This applies to everything about you –– fashion sense; choice of hangout joints; mode of transport to and from campus; type of friends you hang out with; hostel you reside in and very importantly, what you possess in the room.
Campusers (especially guys) pack their rooms with all stuff just to come across as cool –– A TV set, computer, DVD player, woollen carpets huge “mazongoto†beds, fridges, disc racks, DStv dishes and decoders.
When they import (host a girlfriend), those who do not have borrow from their colleagues to impress.
When it comes to the latest trends in fashion and style, ignorance is no excuse, but most of all, it is unforgivable!
Campusers are trendy and highly fashion conscious. Chicks wear skimpy outfits that send men’s testosterone levels skyrocketing.
Since it is not cool to be seen in the same attire several times, one must ensure they have a sizeable wardrobe. Some girls miss lectures for “lack of what to wear.â€
Girls visit the salon weekly to retouch their hair. This is no cheap feat, so many utilise guys they do not really love, but only hang out for money, all in the name of being cool.
For guys, formality in style is cherished because it says you are mature to the ladies. Some guys stock a few nice shirts and two trousers for the weekdays. The rest are casual clothes for the weekend. It is cool that way.
And food? Some government-sponsored students think it is not cool at all to have meals in the halls. Such students sell their meal cards and opt to eat take-aways.
The financially-challenged who reside in hostels buy cheap food from makeshift restaurants (Kikumi-kikumi). Moses is one such person, but he tells his girlfriend he eats at the staff canteen because that is cool, even when waiters in Kikumi-kikumi restaurants know him by name.
The mode of transport to campus matters a lot. Footubishi (walking) is not cool. And the funny thing is; there is no way you will deny that you trek from wherever you stay. Your shoes will be dusty in the dry season, and muddy in the rainy season. Hostel vans, boda bodas and taxis are the way to go.
In fact, it is not cool to stay in a hostel without a van; that is a cheap hostel.
High-end hostels like Nana and Akamwesi are greatly envied. It is said students from Nana and Akamwesi always struggle to sit by the van window for everyone to see them.
But being cool on campus does not come cheap. Chicks are on record for borrowing clothes, shoes, bags and even getting sugar daddies to keep up.
Guys who borrow to impress have often been embarrassed when their tricks are discovered; got into debt, starved themselves or fallen in trouble with the law.
You have probably heard the Fanta advert in which a young lady, whom I presume is a “campuser†(university student), is relating a dating experience with a guy to her girlfriends.
Apparently, everything he did –– from the shoes he wore, to the two “rolexes†(eggs rolled up in a chapati) he ordered, was so uncool. That was, of course, until he ordered the drink.
That advert is right on the money! On campus, being “cool†is the eleventh commandment! You either abide or risk being spurned.
Cool basically means trendy. This applies to everything about you –– fashion sense; choice of hangout joints; mode of transport to and from campus; type of friends you hang out with; hostel you reside in and very importantly, what you possess in the room.
Campusers (especially guys) pack their rooms with all stuff just to come across as cool –– A TV set, computer, DVD player, woollen carpets huge “mazongoto†beds, fridges, disc racks, DStv dishes and decoders.
When they import (host a girlfriend), those who do not have borrow from their colleagues to impress.
When it comes to the latest trends in fashion and style, ignorance is no excuse, but most of all, it is unforgivable!
Campusers are trendy and highly fashion conscious. Chicks wear skimpy outfits that send men’s testosterone levels skyrocketing.
Since it is not cool to be seen in the same attire several times, one must ensure they have a sizeable wardrobe. Some girls miss lectures for “lack of what to wear.â€
Girls visit the salon weekly to retouch their hair. This is no cheap feat, so many utilise guys they do not really love, but only hang out for money, all in the name of being cool.
For guys, formality in style is cherished because it says you are mature to the ladies. Some guys stock a few nice shirts and two trousers for the weekdays. The rest are casual clothes for the weekend. It is cool that way.
And food? Some government-sponsored students think it is not cool at all to have meals in the halls. Such students sell their meal cards and opt to eat take-aways.
The financially-challenged who reside in hostels buy cheap food from makeshift restaurants (Kikumi-kikumi). Moses is one such person, but he tells his girlfriend he eats at the staff canteen because that is cool, even when waiters in Kikumi-kikumi restaurants know him by name.
The mode of transport to campus matters a lot. Footubishi (walking) is not cool. And the funny thing is; there is no way you will deny that you trek from wherever you stay. Your shoes will be dusty in the dry season, and muddy in the rainy season. Hostel vans, boda bodas and taxis are the way to go.
In fact, it is not cool to stay in a hostel without a van; that is a cheap hostel.
High-end hostels like Nana and Akamwesi are greatly envied. It is said students from Nana and Akamwesi always struggle to sit by the van window for everyone to see them.
But being cool on campus does not come cheap. Chicks are on record for borrowing clothes, shoes, bags and even getting sugar daddies to keep up.
Guys who borrow to impress have often been embarrassed when their tricks are discovered; got into debt, starved themselves or fallen in trouble with the law.