Her husband’s death left her in pain, got Okot on her feet

By Frederick Womakuyu
On the verandah of Hotel Roma in Gulu district, an elderly woman sits as if something is bothering her. She picks up a piece of paper and pen from her handbag and scribbles something.

As we approach the hotel entrance, she raises her head and her face lights up as she asks: “Are you the guys from The New Vision?”

When we answer affirmatively, she continues: “How has been Women’s Day?” but before we can reply, she adds: “To me, this day means women getting a chance to showcase what they have been doing all along. It means a woman has to be judged; whether she has done her duties as a mother and wife or not.”

At 77, Tezira Okot believes she has done her duties as a woman and it is the reason she evaluates herself. But for her, being a woman is just part of her duties because when her husband died, she had to take care of her eight children — paying fees and meeting their essential needs.

Although it was a task, Okot worked hard at her jobs as a nurse and business woman. She undertook the side business after realising the money she earned as a nurse was not enough to support her children at school and pay other bills.

When Okot’s husband died, she only depended on her salary and his pension, but since that time, she has built a hotel, educated her children up to university and built a students’ hostel next to Gulu University. Her investments have earned her enough money to help her relatives.

Some call her an achiever, teacher or nurse but to others, she is a pioneer of girls’ education in her community.

Okot, who hails from Amuru district, was born in Jinja where her father worked as a policeman. Her mother was a house wife.

“At my father’s workplace, there used to be a girl who worked as a clerk. She was smart and hardworking,” Okot recalls. “My father admired her and wanted me to be like her. That is when he embraced education of the girl-child, something that was a taboo in our community those days.”

Eager to see his daughter emulate the clerk, the policeman sent Okot to Gulu Girls’ School, headed by a British woman who was a crusader of girls’ education in the Acholi region.

“I completed primary school and joined Gayaza High School for junior secondary. I passed well and was admitted to Mengo Nursing School,” she says.

Okot wanted to become a nurse because as a student in primary and high school, she served as an untrained nurse for the scouts and Girl Guide movement.

“I used to take care of athletes during games and sports. I would give them first aid and this made me love nursing,” she explains.

Okot trained as a nurse for three years and got excellent grades. She says some students were forced by their parents to study nursing, but they all dropped out. Okot has advice for such parents.

“Studying nursing or medicine is from the heart. It demands a lot and one needs to attend to the patient 24 hours. If you force someone into it, that person will not love their work and may opt to give up or cause death of many patients.”

To reward her for the good performance, Okot was given a scholarship to study midwifery at the same school. At the end of her course, she was given a job and worked for four years before she
was transferred to Gulu Hospital.

“At the hospital, I also taught junior nurses. That is when I met my husband whom I married in 1952,” she adds.

“He was a doctor. He had time for me and the children.”

Unfortunately, Okot could not continue working as a nurse because she could not balance her job that required her to work for 24
hours and attending to her children.

“I left the job and, fearing to remain dependent, I enrolled for a course in social work,” she says. She was then recruited as the in-charge of women’s programmes in Gulu district.

Part of her work was to mobilise parents to send girls to school. “At first, the response was not good, but when we insisted on creating awareness and presenting myself as an example, they gradually accepted and many girls went to school,” she adds.

However, disaster struck when Okot lost her husband in 1970 and had to take care of her children, including an eight-month-old baby who needed her attention all the time.

“Fortunately the Government paid my husband’s pension and gratuity and this relieved me. I hired a part-time worker to take care of the baby while I did my job.”

Okot worked hard and educated her children single-handed. The children too did not disappoint her. They completed school and started working, relieving her of the strain of paying fees.

“In 1993, after educating all the children, I went into business to prepare for old age. I applied for a loan from the Cooperative Bank and bought a lorry,” she adds.

She hired her son as a driver and transported bricks, sand and other construction materials as well as farmers’ produce. They raised enough money and constructed Roma Hotel, the first of its kind in Gulu.

Using her skills as a social worker, Okot has managed her hotel efficiently and today, it has expanded from one building to two, with about 20 rooms. The hotel is clean, spacious and has self-contained rooms with water and toilets.

“I have also turned my late husband’s former house into a hostel for students of Gulu University. It accommodates a maximum of 50 students,” Okot explains.

Okot adds that her success is a reflection of her background. “My father instilled discipline and hard work in us. During holidays, he made us work in the garden and emphasised hardwork.”

Okot sympathises with the children of today. “What they learn at school is exam-oriented. They are not taught home economics and when girls marry, they don’t know how to cook and take care of a home,” she adds.

“There are more marriage break ups and homes are having numerous problems.”

Okot is also not happy with the nurses of today. “Many of the nurses do not take their job seriously. They report to work late and do not attend to the patient for 24 hours as required.”

She says in their days, nurses were required to be on duty for 24 hours and worked for very little pay, but did the job efficiently.

“All we cared about was saving lives. It feels good to be recognised for saving lives with little pay. You cannot neglect life because you are demanding more money,” she says.

Okot urges nurses to take their jobs seriously and enroll for further studies to improve on their careers.

She also advises young girls intending to marry to learn a woman’s duty from their mothers and grandmothers.

“A woman is the heart of the home; she is supposed to take care of the children, visitors and her husband; make sure they are all comfortable and have what to eat. A woman should also keep the home neat.

“A husband is the pillar of the home. He makes sure that food and all basic needs in a home are available,” she states.

Okot adds that women empowerment does not mean that a woman becomes a man and vice-versa. “It means knowing your duties. This will keep your marriage stable and long lasting.”

This story competed in the selection, but had not been published