How can i get my 4-year-old to pay attention?
Aug 19, 2009
Dear Jamesa,<br>I have a son aged four in middle class. His kindergarten teacher complains about his lack of concentration in class. He enjoys talking and doing other things than paying attention to the teacher. At home, he never sits in one place.
Dear Jamesa,
I have a son aged four in middle class. His kindergarten teacher complains about his lack of concentration in class. He enjoys talking and doing other things than paying attention to the teacher. At home, he never sits in one place.
He runs or jumps around. When I ask him to identify numbers or letters, he says: “I don’t know.†You help me.†When I ask him the same question after some hours, he insists he does not know even after I have helped him.  But when he is in a good mood he answers everything correctly if he knows the answer.
I wonder why he behaves like this. I normally beat him when my patience runs out. Things get even worse when he is doing homework with his dad. What do we do?
NRK
Dear NRK,
Kindergarten originated from Germany and the word literally means ‘children’s garden.’
It is a form of education where children are taught to develop basic skills through creative play and social interaction. In kindergarten, children receive a sociological orientation to learning through play, communication skills and interaction.
Learning in a kindergarten occurs through the use of learning aids, play, songs, rhymes and games. Before a teacher complains about a child’s lack of concentration, we need to establish the teaching approach being used in that kindergarten.
Children in a kindergarten have limited attention span which calls for regular change of activity. At his age, your son is not expected to listen like an adult, especially when the teaching is more intellectual than play-centred. He might also be an active child with a short attention span.
Children with a short attention span get impatient, or restless when forced to listen longer than they can manage.
It is important for you and his teacher to understand that your son is a four–year–old. At his developmental stage, he understands the world best through play, not through letters and figures. His restlessness while at home is normal and expected. It shows that his developing brain is interacting with the environment.
One of the prerequisites to learning is a child’s physical and psychological readiness. Readiness affects concentration and the child’s ability to grasp concepts. Active as he is, your son is not yet developmentally ready for abstract learning. Pushing theoretical letters and figures down his throat might only cause ‘academic constipation.’
The desire to play is normal for a four–year–old because to them play is learning and learning is play. Are you beating him for ‘behaving like a normal child?’ His failure to remember the letters or digits is a normal learning challenge, not a crime. Children are emotionally sensitive. Beating him might make him associate learning with pain, hence sowing hatred seeds for school.
Most kindergartens have degenerated from ‘children’s gardens’ to lecture rooms where youngsters battle with abstract concepts. For a child to learn a new concept, equal attention should be paid to the approach and content.
Parenting is an interesting journey of discovery and you should not fear making mistakes. Every developmental stage creates great learning opportunities.
TIPS
Think of alternative approaches like tracing the letters or singing a song about the letters or colouring the letters and digits
Avail educational toys and play materials at home that would enable him learn as he plays
Shift from academic to play–based homework. You could use workbooks with activities like colouring, painting, or drawing. Everything has to be learnt through play and fun.
Do not show impatience, anger or disappointment. Be interactive by smiling, praising his efforts and being positive.
Change activity or give it a break in case he shows signs of boredom or disinterest.
Do not expect your child to grow up too soon. Childhood is ‘a right’ he is entitled to enjoy.
jwagwau@newvision.co.ug
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I have a son aged four in middle class. His kindergarten teacher complains about his lack of concentration in class. He enjoys talking and doing other things than paying attention to the teacher. At home, he never sits in one place.
He runs or jumps around. When I ask him to identify numbers or letters, he says: “I don’t know.†You help me.†When I ask him the same question after some hours, he insists he does not know even after I have helped him.  But when he is in a good mood he answers everything correctly if he knows the answer.
I wonder why he behaves like this. I normally beat him when my patience runs out. Things get even worse when he is doing homework with his dad. What do we do?
NRK
Dear NRK,
Kindergarten originated from Germany and the word literally means ‘children’s garden.’
It is a form of education where children are taught to develop basic skills through creative play and social interaction. In kindergarten, children receive a sociological orientation to learning through play, communication skills and interaction.
Learning in a kindergarten occurs through the use of learning aids, play, songs, rhymes and games. Before a teacher complains about a child’s lack of concentration, we need to establish the teaching approach being used in that kindergarten.
Children in a kindergarten have limited attention span which calls for regular change of activity. At his age, your son is not expected to listen like an adult, especially when the teaching is more intellectual than play-centred. He might also be an active child with a short attention span.
Children with a short attention span get impatient, or restless when forced to listen longer than they can manage.
It is important for you and his teacher to understand that your son is a four–year–old. At his developmental stage, he understands the world best through play, not through letters and figures. His restlessness while at home is normal and expected. It shows that his developing brain is interacting with the environment.
One of the prerequisites to learning is a child’s physical and psychological readiness. Readiness affects concentration and the child’s ability to grasp concepts. Active as he is, your son is not yet developmentally ready for abstract learning. Pushing theoretical letters and figures down his throat might only cause ‘academic constipation.’
The desire to play is normal for a four–year–old because to them play is learning and learning is play. Are you beating him for ‘behaving like a normal child?’ His failure to remember the letters or digits is a normal learning challenge, not a crime. Children are emotionally sensitive. Beating him might make him associate learning with pain, hence sowing hatred seeds for school.
Most kindergartens have degenerated from ‘children’s gardens’ to lecture rooms where youngsters battle with abstract concepts. For a child to learn a new concept, equal attention should be paid to the approach and content.
Parenting is an interesting journey of discovery and you should not fear making mistakes. Every developmental stage creates great learning opportunities.
TIPS
jwagwau@newvision.co.ug
 Â