You are disrespectful
Oct 30, 2009
By 30, society expects a man to be married. However, some are not married because they are their own problem. In a continuation of our series, Raphael Okello tells you why we think you are not yet married.
30, and not married
By 30, society expects a man to be married. However, some are not married because they are their own problem. In a continuation of our series, Raphael Okello tells you why we think you are not yet married.
Disrespect equals abusive (verbally or otherwise) and arrogance. During fights, which by the way, all partners have, you talk down to her like she is a kindergarten kid. Some guys even spit in their girlfriends’ faces during fights! Eeew!
In short, you are like an archeological remnant of a typical “alpha male†plucked out of the pre-colonial African traditional society, where women’s opinions never mattered because the authority of a man was measured partly by how much he subdued his partner.
Women and society were okay with that arrangement. Times have changed and you need to change as well or you might as well buckle up for a long, bumpy bachelor ride, my friend.
Fine, if you are lucky, she might stick around to see if she can change you (women will always try to change a man for the better). But do not count on her sticking around for long because she will eventually realise it is not her destiny to embark on a life long project to change you.
“If I am crazily attracted to him, I would date for a while, just to get him out of my system and then move on. But I would not think of him as my future husband,†says a colleague.
So, just because you have read relationship literature documenting the mystery of women’s attraction to bad boys does not mean you turn into a kiwani bad boy. You have to respect your girlfriend because your behaviour now (as her boyfriend) is exactly how she envisions you will be in marriage. If it is a fight, be civil about it.
Marriage is about understanding one another. It is not a one-way super highway.
“If you cannot respect me when we are dating, why should I expect royal treatment later when we get married?†asks Jackie.
So now you have discovered why, despite your ‘hot’ look, women have been going through you and then out like a border post.
By 30, society expects a man to be married. However, some are not married because they are their own problem. In a continuation of our series, Raphael Okello tells you why we think you are not yet married.
Disrespect equals abusive (verbally or otherwise) and arrogance. During fights, which by the way, all partners have, you talk down to her like she is a kindergarten kid. Some guys even spit in their girlfriends’ faces during fights! Eeew!
In short, you are like an archeological remnant of a typical “alpha male†plucked out of the pre-colonial African traditional society, where women’s opinions never mattered because the authority of a man was measured partly by how much he subdued his partner.
Women and society were okay with that arrangement. Times have changed and you need to change as well or you might as well buckle up for a long, bumpy bachelor ride, my friend.
Fine, if you are lucky, she might stick around to see if she can change you (women will always try to change a man for the better). But do not count on her sticking around for long because she will eventually realise it is not her destiny to embark on a life long project to change you.
“If I am crazily attracted to him, I would date for a while, just to get him out of my system and then move on. But I would not think of him as my future husband,†says a colleague.
So, just because you have read relationship literature documenting the mystery of women’s attraction to bad boys does not mean you turn into a kiwani bad boy. You have to respect your girlfriend because your behaviour now (as her boyfriend) is exactly how she envisions you will be in marriage. If it is a fight, be civil about it.
Marriage is about understanding one another. It is not a one-way super highway.
“If you cannot respect me when we are dating, why should I expect royal treatment later when we get married?†asks Jackie.
So now you have discovered why, despite your ‘hot’ look, women have been going through you and then out like a border post.