Crying is healthy
Four months after mum’s death, I am still crying. I cry when people convey their condolences or when things get tough.
By Carol Natukunda
Four months after mum’s death, I am still crying. I cry when people convey their condolences or when things get tough.
Initially, it was a bit of a problem, with everybody urging me to be strong, to stop crying. But health experts say crying has a potential to heal your pain. Losing someone or something you love is very painful and if it goes unacknowledged or unattended to, it can result in disability, according to Dr. Scovia Bateirana, a private clinical psychologist.
“Grief that is expressed has a potential for healing,†Bateirana says. “Chemically, tears of emotional pain differ from tears of laughter, or tears of physical pain.
Tears help wash out negative chemicals building up when our body experiences pain or stress.â€
Bateirana explains that if you hold up the tears, it is like keeping hot steam and your blood pressure could rise. “So,†she advises, “cry as long as you need to.â€
However, as Bateirana says, crying is not the only way that makes grieving complete and positive. We probably know of people who haven’t cried with us, which may make us angry and resentful. Does it mean they didn’t care?
“Some people want to cry but just feel they cannot open the ducts. Some select the time and place where they can release the ‘flood’ but remain silent, tears flowing inside. They punch a wall, or write down what they feel,†Bateirana says.
Four months after mum’s death, I am still crying. I cry when people convey their condolences or when things get tough.
Initially, it was a bit of a problem, with everybody urging me to be strong, to stop crying. But health experts say crying has a potential to heal your pain. Losing someone or something you love is very painful and if it goes unacknowledged or unattended to, it can result in disability, according to Dr. Scovia Bateirana, a private clinical psychologist.
“Grief that is expressed has a potential for healing,†Bateirana says. “Chemically, tears of emotional pain differ from tears of laughter, or tears of physical pain.
Tears help wash out negative chemicals building up when our body experiences pain or stress.â€
Bateirana explains that if you hold up the tears, it is like keeping hot steam and your blood pressure could rise. “So,†she advises, “cry as long as you need to.â€
However, as Bateirana says, crying is not the only way that makes grieving complete and positive. We probably know of people who haven’t cried with us, which may make us angry and resentful. Does it mean they didn’t care?
“Some people want to cry but just feel they cannot open the ducts. Some select the time and place where they can release the ‘flood’ but remain silent, tears flowing inside. They punch a wall, or write down what they feel,†Bateirana says.