Handling difficult people at work

By Fred Ouma

OFFICE life can have its ups and downs, but enduring a jerk is one of the most miserable things. Office jerks take on many forms, and thus require innovative tactics for handling them. Below are some common types and how to approach them.

The phone-taunts
These talk loudly with a mix of gestures. “The first step is to pull them aside quietly and ask them to lower their voices,” says Silvia Nandera, a human resource and management consultant. “If this does not stop them, you could dish out the same treatment and stand near their cubicle and talk loudly. Or you can hold up a sign that says, ‘Please turn volume down.’”

The hang-arounder
When confronting a co-worker who chronically loiters forth-and-back to chat when you are trying to meet a deadline (a subtle jerk), stand up when they enter your office or cubicle. “The unspoken message of your body language will clearly tell him or her to keep it brief and head for the door,” says Julius Kateega, a career coach consultant and trainer.

The idea stealer
There is a strong possibility that this jerk can not distinguish between a good and bad idea. “Somewhere along the way, slip in a really bad idea and let the jerk steal that,” says Ken Lloyd, the author of Jerks at Work: How to Deal With People Problems and Problem People. However, beware that this might only encourage the jerk to become worse.

The agenda monopoliser
Get creative. “Go cocktail style,” Nandera suggests. “Eliminate the chairs and make it a stand-up meeting.” The monopoliser is likely to get thrown off and will not have time to settle into the usual routine of unproductive dominance.

The kraal bull
Remember, no one is supposed to be bullied irrespective of their rank in the organisation. “Hold your ground and refuse to be bullied,” says Patrick Okee, a workplace researcher. “They will usually back off over time.”

The big fish
Sometimes dealing with a jerk should not be your problem, particularly if you have a supervisor who is a jerk. In this case, you might take a look around the company and notice several jerks. “This may be part of the company culture,” Okee says. “Get out!”

The following are more coping strategies.

Passive: Avoidance is the most obvious solution if you do not want a confrontation with a jerk. “You can go to your boss and ask him/her to intervene,” says Nandera. If the situation is unbearable, ask to be relocated to another part of the office.

Active: If that does not work and the jerk will not cease the annoying behaviour, talk to the person. “Difficult people do not always know they are being difficult,” Ruth Ssenyonyi, a counsellor says. “People generally do not have a high level of self-awareness, so specific and constructive feedback is important.”
If you must confront a jerk, take the high road. Ssenyonyi says: “Try to understand where the behaviour is coming from and tailor your response to that.”

Phrases like:
“So you have heard about a co-worker?
“Oh, that is just the way he/she is.”
“Don’t let it bother you,” can help.

According to labour laws, silence or tacit support of jerkism could fuel lawsuits alleging a hostile work environment, harassment or discrimination.
Even if the jerk does not incite legal action, he or she is sapping workplace morale and destroying any semblance of teamwork.
Sometimes: “That’s the way he or she is,” is not a good excuse. It is a reason to take action.

Action should include a face-to-face meeting with the employee. Give specific examples about why things said or done by the jerk are not acceptable. Write expectations for better behaviour into the formal performance evaluation document and take disciplinary action if the higher expectations are not met. Co-workers will say thanks.