Chivalry died long ago!
Sep 25, 2008
WHERE some still think chivalry is on its deathbed; it died long ago. In my case, the death occurred about 10 years ago. <br>A pretty lady I had saved from the jaws of rape by a whisker during one of the numerous strikes at Makerere University prompted my last deed of valour towards women.
By Alex Balimwikungu
WHERE some still think chivalry is on its deathbed; it died long ago. In my case, the death occurred about 10 years ago.
A pretty lady I had saved from the jaws of rape by a whisker during one of the numerous strikes at Makerere University prompted my last deed of valour towards women.
I somehow wrestled her from the savages; forget I took a beating in the process. Somehow later, it was the two of us at the safety of her room at her hall of residence.
My mind racing, my heart dancing, you guessed the debate in a bachelor’s mind then. And what does she tell me shortly after she stopped weeping and composed herself: “… Thank you so much. I will tell my boyfriend about you.â€
This, after I had earlier assured her that whenever there was a scare on campus, there would be Alex to care. I performed my deed of valour.
In medieval France, sons of the bourgeoisies were taken to special aristocratic schools and groomed on how to handle women.
Such a school in Uganda would have zero attendance. Women do not find reason or give reason to be treated special.
You do not need to look at that couple next door to tell that courteous behaviour of men towards women belonged to the medieval times. It appears out of fashion these days; actually most couples walk in single file or so far apart you imagine they are preparing for a military goose march.
Apart from the few cases at church where you see some ‘brothers’ helping the ‘sisters’ carry things, opening doors and allowing them to go first in lunch fellowship lines (of course when they know someone like the senior pastor is watching,) such cases are a rarity.
Before you start wondering why most men, including yours truly, will not open doors for women; help with her seat, give up their seat, give their arm or bother to ask if she needs anything? It has nothing to do with the lack of knightly schooling.
The answer is with the ladies themselves. They have taught us how to get them, but not how keep them.
Most of our Ugandan women do not ask men for dates, they do not ask for your phone number and worst of all, as a rule, many never let you know when they are attracted to you.
They leave it all to you to figure out. Assuming you successfully map your way to her heart (obviously after a hassle and hefty bills), you are better off reflecting on how you got her rather than how to treat her.
Even when you thought treating a woman nicely was a vital ingredient to romance, most women are no longer keen on being treated nicely.
One lady says romance is an invention by broke men who fear to spend. Look around you, don’t you realise that women respond more to men who enhance their own desirability rather than acts of chivalry?
Take it or leave it, these is what it takes to make men attractive to most women, today. Welcome to modern chivalry.
WHERE some still think chivalry is on its deathbed; it died long ago. In my case, the death occurred about 10 years ago.
A pretty lady I had saved from the jaws of rape by a whisker during one of the numerous strikes at Makerere University prompted my last deed of valour towards women.
I somehow wrestled her from the savages; forget I took a beating in the process. Somehow later, it was the two of us at the safety of her room at her hall of residence.
My mind racing, my heart dancing, you guessed the debate in a bachelor’s mind then. And what does she tell me shortly after she stopped weeping and composed herself: “… Thank you so much. I will tell my boyfriend about you.â€
This, after I had earlier assured her that whenever there was a scare on campus, there would be Alex to care. I performed my deed of valour.
In medieval France, sons of the bourgeoisies were taken to special aristocratic schools and groomed on how to handle women.
Such a school in Uganda would have zero attendance. Women do not find reason or give reason to be treated special.
You do not need to look at that couple next door to tell that courteous behaviour of men towards women belonged to the medieval times. It appears out of fashion these days; actually most couples walk in single file or so far apart you imagine they are preparing for a military goose march.
Apart from the few cases at church where you see some ‘brothers’ helping the ‘sisters’ carry things, opening doors and allowing them to go first in lunch fellowship lines (of course when they know someone like the senior pastor is watching,) such cases are a rarity.
Before you start wondering why most men, including yours truly, will not open doors for women; help with her seat, give up their seat, give their arm or bother to ask if she needs anything? It has nothing to do with the lack of knightly schooling.
The answer is with the ladies themselves. They have taught us how to get them, but not how keep them.
Most of our Ugandan women do not ask men for dates, they do not ask for your phone number and worst of all, as a rule, many never let you know when they are attracted to you.
They leave it all to you to figure out. Assuming you successfully map your way to her heart (obviously after a hassle and hefty bills), you are better off reflecting on how you got her rather than how to treat her.
Even when you thought treating a woman nicely was a vital ingredient to romance, most women are no longer keen on being treated nicely.
One lady says romance is an invention by broke men who fear to spend. Look around you, don’t you realise that women respond more to men who enhance their own desirability rather than acts of chivalry?
Take it or leave it, these is what it takes to make men attractive to most women, today. Welcome to modern chivalry.