I am losing my patience
Jan 12, 2007
YOU ASK US<br><br>Dear aunt,<br>I have been seeing a guy for eight months, but he is very proud, loves to control me and expects too much respect. He wants to be the boss all the time and expects me to beg him. I am more educated than he is (which is okay with me), but he is so conscious of it th
YOU ASK US
Dear aunt,
I have been seeing a guy for eight months, but he is very proud, loves to control me and expects too much respect. He wants to be the boss all the time and expects me to beg him. I am more educated than he is (which is okay with me), but he is so conscious of it that he keeps reminding me that he is ‘the one in charge’. He claims to be a Christian, but l found out it was all lies. Recently, I told him our affair was over, but he keeps sending emails and calling me as if we are in love. I am losing my patience with him. What do l do?
- Leah
Dear Leah,
A difference in the levels of education can be a sharp thorn in a relationship, especially if one partner feels insecure. Your boyfriend’s lower education level might have created a vacuum in his life.
His pride, desire to control and expectation of too much respect are different ways he is using to compensate for that vacuum.
Maybe, your career status also threatens him, hence he has to keep reminding you of his ‘position’ lest you take him for granted.
Do you ever make him feel inferior by reminding him of your education level? This imbalance might threaten your communication making it difficult for you to enjoy your sweet moments.
It appears you have called it quits, but your boyfriend finds it difficult to accept this reality. Most men of lower education level derive pride from relating with ladies of higher education.
In case this relationship helps to fill a vacuum in your boyfriend’s life, he might become reluctant to let go. Since you cannot love somebody out of sympathy, you need to be sure that you are seeing the right man before you get intimate. Do not play hid-and-seek, make it clear to him that the affair cannot work.
Dear aunt,
I have been seeing a guy for eight months, but he is very proud, loves to control me and expects too much respect. He wants to be the boss all the time and expects me to beg him. I am more educated than he is (which is okay with me), but he is so conscious of it that he keeps reminding me that he is ‘the one in charge’. He claims to be a Christian, but l found out it was all lies. Recently, I told him our affair was over, but he keeps sending emails and calling me as if we are in love. I am losing my patience with him. What do l do?
- Leah
Dear Leah,
A difference in the levels of education can be a sharp thorn in a relationship, especially if one partner feels insecure. Your boyfriend’s lower education level might have created a vacuum in his life.
His pride, desire to control and expectation of too much respect are different ways he is using to compensate for that vacuum.
Maybe, your career status also threatens him, hence he has to keep reminding you of his ‘position’ lest you take him for granted.
Do you ever make him feel inferior by reminding him of your education level? This imbalance might threaten your communication making it difficult for you to enjoy your sweet moments.
It appears you have called it quits, but your boyfriend finds it difficult to accept this reality. Most men of lower education level derive pride from relating with ladies of higher education.
In case this relationship helps to fill a vacuum in your boyfriend’s life, he might become reluctant to let go. Since you cannot love somebody out of sympathy, you need to be sure that you are seeing the right man before you get intimate. Do not play hid-and-seek, make it clear to him that the affair cannot work.