Married couples had better start using condoms
According to a report on ‘Consistent Condom Use among Ugandan Couples in Primary Relationships’ released recently, some married couples are consistently using condoms as opposed to earlier reports that had showed that it was impossible for married people or those in stable relationships to use c
By Monicah Amoding
According to a report on ‘Consistent Condom Use among Ugandan Couples in Primary Relationships’ released recently, some married couples are consistently using condoms as opposed to earlier reports that had showed that it was impossible for married people or those in stable relationships to use condoms.
This is good news considering a 2006 report by the Uganda AIDS Commission that indicated that there were about 132,000 new infections in Uganda and 60% of them occurring among the married women aged 30-34 and married men aged 40-44.
Condoms are an effective method of preventing HIV/AIDS among married people.
Why is marriage increasingly becoming risky?
When children are growing up, females are advised to remain chaste while the boys are encouraged to experiment with their manhood.
Marital counselling focuses on making girls ‘good women’ by remaining faithful to their partners. For the men, they learn from their fathers, relatives and other men they relate with. If his father or male relative or even friends engage in multiple relationships or are violent to their partners, he is also likely to emulate those behaviours in his own relationship. This kind of socialisation of boy children leaves them to practice reckless and irresponsible sexual behaviour likely to expose them to HIV/AIDS.
There are also negative notions like sex is not enjoyable with a condom, that discourage married couples from using condoms. I have heard men saying ‘I cannot use a condom with my wife’. And yet the truth is that even when such a man sleeps with another woman chances are that he will not use a condom. This leaves many women vulnerable to infection from their partners. Refusing to use condoms with your partner is sexual violence because you are denying them the right to make choices in sexual matters. The failure of our society to seriously condemn marital unfaithfulness especially by men renders marriage a risky place for HIV infection for many women. So why not encourage married people to use condoms?
Look at our polygamous Ugandans, where one man has two, three or four wives. One wife might be faithful in such a relationship, but she cannot guarantee that the same is true for the other partners. So how can we guarantee that such a relationship can be safe from HIV by one partner being faithful to the other four partners? The ideal situation here is for every partner to consistently use condoms.
The HIV/AIDS campaign messages focusing only on faithfulness for married people is partly responsible for the increase of infections among married people. What is wrong with a married person permanently using a condom in their sexual relationship?
Doctors prescribe condoms for people living positively to avoid re-infection. Don’t positive couples and the many other people using condoms enjoy sexual intercourse therefore? The refusal to use condoms is only a mindset issue that many couples need to transform.
Consistent condom use should therefore be taken as a normal sexual practice and a prerequisite by couples for the sure safety that they provide for people in marital relationships. This calls for the HIV/AIDS prevention messages to aim at increasing appreciation of condom use among married people. The HIV/AIDS policy as well as the HIV law, all in the making should also ensure that married couples have a right to demand for condom use in their relationships.
The writer is the Media and Advocacy Officer at the Centre for Domestic Violence Prevention
According to a report on ‘Consistent Condom Use among Ugandan Couples in Primary Relationships’ released recently, some married couples are consistently using condoms as opposed to earlier reports that had showed that it was impossible for married people or those in stable relationships to use condoms.
This is good news considering a 2006 report by the Uganda AIDS Commission that indicated that there were about 132,000 new infections in Uganda and 60% of them occurring among the married women aged 30-34 and married men aged 40-44.
Condoms are an effective method of preventing HIV/AIDS among married people.
Why is marriage increasingly becoming risky?
When children are growing up, females are advised to remain chaste while the boys are encouraged to experiment with their manhood.
Marital counselling focuses on making girls ‘good women’ by remaining faithful to their partners. For the men, they learn from their fathers, relatives and other men they relate with. If his father or male relative or even friends engage in multiple relationships or are violent to their partners, he is also likely to emulate those behaviours in his own relationship. This kind of socialisation of boy children leaves them to practice reckless and irresponsible sexual behaviour likely to expose them to HIV/AIDS.
There are also negative notions like sex is not enjoyable with a condom, that discourage married couples from using condoms. I have heard men saying ‘I cannot use a condom with my wife’. And yet the truth is that even when such a man sleeps with another woman chances are that he will not use a condom. This leaves many women vulnerable to infection from their partners. Refusing to use condoms with your partner is sexual violence because you are denying them the right to make choices in sexual matters. The failure of our society to seriously condemn marital unfaithfulness especially by men renders marriage a risky place for HIV infection for many women. So why not encourage married people to use condoms?
Look at our polygamous Ugandans, where one man has two, three or four wives. One wife might be faithful in such a relationship, but she cannot guarantee that the same is true for the other partners. So how can we guarantee that such a relationship can be safe from HIV by one partner being faithful to the other four partners? The ideal situation here is for every partner to consistently use condoms.
The HIV/AIDS campaign messages focusing only on faithfulness for married people is partly responsible for the increase of infections among married people. What is wrong with a married person permanently using a condom in their sexual relationship?
Doctors prescribe condoms for people living positively to avoid re-infection. Don’t positive couples and the many other people using condoms enjoy sexual intercourse therefore? The refusal to use condoms is only a mindset issue that many couples need to transform.
Consistent condom use should therefore be taken as a normal sexual practice and a prerequisite by couples for the sure safety that they provide for people in marital relationships. This calls for the HIV/AIDS prevention messages to aim at increasing appreciation of condom use among married people. The HIV/AIDS policy as well as the HIV law, all in the making should also ensure that married couples have a right to demand for condom use in their relationships.
The writer is the Media and Advocacy Officer at the Centre for Domestic Violence Prevention