WE agreed last time that it was safer to allow your girlfriend to have as many other male friends than women friends. Many girls gave me a high five for that wisdom and wanted to know whether what is good for the goose is also good for the gander.

No is my answer! Letting your man hang out with female friends is like going to pray in Luwagga’s church in Kalerwe on a rainy day. You may pray for paradise and die instantly.

Women can tolerate many things except themselves. They tend to play Museveni-Besigye games, only that they play them better.

A fellow woman tends to arouse feelings of competition, jealousy, temptation to sabotage, intrigue, subversions and other words of the same lineage.

The most dangerous ones are covert – they sing your praises but vote for the opposition. Thus when your boyfriend cracks a very funny joke that sends them all rolling, one of them will be thinking that you don’t deserve such a marvellous guy, imagining how glorious he can be under the cover of darkness and how she can make him more comfortable than you do. Some may want to seduce him, if only to prove to themselves that they are more worthy.

“Even if he asks and I refuse,” her ego will be whispering, “I would have known that I am better. After all, he came for me in spite of her presence.”

Add some alcohol in this contest and you will see more like an LC 3 election in Kampala; boxing, stabbing, tear gas, death and petitions.

Wine brings to the surface unscrupulous attempts to rig you out, involving rumours, seduction, vote-rigging and trumped-up charges.

Before the cock crows thrice, you will be deported like Blake Lambert on the grounds of national security. And you will regret why you did not read this column.
The nature of men makes the situation worse. For sex, men need a chance, an opportunity, a place. But women need a reason. Thus faced with seduction from a girlfriend’s friend, a man is more likely to endorse action because trespassing in sex is not in their penal code.

Even when he knows a brother who died in the process, a man will not hesitate to bite the groundnut on the rat trap if he convinces himself that the main girlfriend won’t know.

Therefore, my sister, beware of a guy who flirts with your friends, rushing to label you insecure when you complain. Never relent. Keep encouraging him to take advantage of male company that will not lead him into temptation but deliver him from evil.

True male company does not return a clean sheet. He may learn arrogance, drinking and, yes, womanising. But he will still return home for the warmth of your embrace without the anger from your alleged secrets that your girlfriends would have told him. And if he is to err, at least it won’t be with a trusted friend. An election challenge from a foe like Miria doesn’t hurt as one from a former comrade like Besigye. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

hbainemigisha@newvision.co.ug

Your man is not safe with female friends