I am 20. Should I try having sex?
I am a student aged 20 and I have never had sexual intercourse. I feel I need to have this experience like my friends but I fear because I have been told that sex for the first time is painful.
A Dear aunt,
I am a student aged 20 and I have never had sexual intercourse. I feel I need to have this experience like my friends but I fear because I have been told that sex for the first time is painful. What approach can I use to deal with my fear?
David
Q Dear David,
I must commend you for making it to the age of 20 years without venturing into sex. The peer pressure is making you feel guilty rather than proud of your virginity. Bear in mind that the firm wall of virtue you have built for 20 years might come tumbling down within few minutes of temptation.
You must have heard both right and wrong information regarding sex from different sources. One fact that you need to get right is that sex is fulfilling when you have it at the right time, right place and with the right person.
You seem to be more excited with the pleasure involved than with the risks. Have you thought about the possibility of contracting HIV in the process of breaking your virginity? How about the possibility of making the girl pregnant? Will you be ready to shoulder the responsibility that sex entails?
Your desire to venture into sex because your friends have tried it is a sign of peer pressure.
Succumbing to peer pressure could be a sign of either low esteem or a crave of group acceptance.
A face to face talk with a professional counsellor will help you clarify your values.
I am a student aged 20 and I have never had sexual intercourse. I feel I need to have this experience like my friends but I fear because I have been told that sex for the first time is painful. What approach can I use to deal with my fear?
David
Q Dear David,
I must commend you for making it to the age of 20 years without venturing into sex. The peer pressure is making you feel guilty rather than proud of your virginity. Bear in mind that the firm wall of virtue you have built for 20 years might come tumbling down within few minutes of temptation.
You must have heard both right and wrong information regarding sex from different sources. One fact that you need to get right is that sex is fulfilling when you have it at the right time, right place and with the right person.
You seem to be more excited with the pleasure involved than with the risks. Have you thought about the possibility of contracting HIV in the process of breaking your virginity? How about the possibility of making the girl pregnant? Will you be ready to shoulder the responsibility that sex entails?
Your desire to venture into sex because your friends have tried it is a sign of peer pressure.
Succumbing to peer pressure could be a sign of either low esteem or a crave of group acceptance.
A face to face talk with a professional counsellor will help you clarify your values.