Can a real man resist the desire for sex?
LAST week, I stumbled upon a radioactive notebook that, I was lucky, did not land in God’s hands! It was an exercise book I used in the 1980s to record all girls I had a relationships with!
DRLOVE - with Hilary Bainemigisha
LAST week, I stumbled upon a radioactive notebook that, I was lucky, did not land in God’s hands! It was an exercise book I used in the 1980s to record all girls I had a relationships with!
When I was an adolescent, I strongly believed in open political space and tried as much as possible to fill this space with girlfriends. I basked in prestige about the numbers of hides and skins I hanged out to dry.
We often brought out our books to grade ourselves against each other, which meant some of those names could have been ghost girlfriends — only that I have forgotten many of them!
As I hid from prying eyes to look through the names, I did not feel the pride I used to get as I turned to write on the next page. It is wrong to define manhood by sexual rampage. What can we a call a person who can even chase a lion if it put on a dress? A man? No! A weakling!
Most adolescents and many adults believe the more notches you tie on your bow, the manlier you are. I have friends who still feel jealous of Abdu Mulaasi and have registered as voters for his ‘Ngenda Kusiba Farm party’.
Others smile at the guy who runs several women and frown at the male adult virgins. And some of the male virgins fear to declare their assets because many Africans associate multiple partners with sexual prowess.
But this is getting it wrong. The power of manhood is not in distributing sex. It is in resisting temptation to bite the bait. And the bigger the temptation you resist, the manlier you are. Sex is sweet and for men, the dominating sense of conquest builds one’s ego. But this means that whoever lets himself loose into the multiples of sex adventure has succumbed to the obvious temptation.
That is not strength. It is a weakness. A man who cannot say ‘No’ to an open opportunity for sex is not man enough. He is a weakling! He is as spineless as the drunkard who cannot leave an extra bottle.
When this workmate asks you to visit her at home and aggressively seduces you to bed with provocative wear, soft music, dim lighting, sexy voice and tears, you may hear an inner voice urging you not to let mankind and your own manhood down.
If you fail to let this cup pass, you will not be a victor; you will be a loser, a pathetic failure who could not control your own bodily urges.
The urge for sex is associated with the testosterone hormone. Testosterone is secreted in the testes of men and the ovaries of women.
It is the principal male sex hormone and plays key roles in enhanced libido. Among other things it helps maintain sex drive, the production of sperm cells and male hair patterns.
During adolescence, the body gets significant doses of testosterone that often takes over the driver’s seat to propel an individual like a rally car. When it stabilises, a layman says you have become an adult. But some people never grow. The urge to conquer and dominate through sex leads them on by a cord like slaves. When any woman can floor you, you are not a man!
In contemporary word, greatness is not in doing what anybody can do but in what fails many, what is said to be difficult and what is not obvious.
If a beautiful woman cannot find a secret number to decode your resistance, she will respect your manly ability to be resistant. In you she will see security and confidence.
For her, you will be the only building that can remain after an earthquake? So, if your saliva drops at the first provocative woman, don’t board a taxi of warriors; you are a weakling. Warriors don’t need sex to prove they are men.
LAST week, I stumbled upon a radioactive notebook that, I was lucky, did not land in God’s hands! It was an exercise book I used in the 1980s to record all girls I had a relationships with!
When I was an adolescent, I strongly believed in open political space and tried as much as possible to fill this space with girlfriends. I basked in prestige about the numbers of hides and skins I hanged out to dry.
We often brought out our books to grade ourselves against each other, which meant some of those names could have been ghost girlfriends — only that I have forgotten many of them!
As I hid from prying eyes to look through the names, I did not feel the pride I used to get as I turned to write on the next page. It is wrong to define manhood by sexual rampage. What can we a call a person who can even chase a lion if it put on a dress? A man? No! A weakling!
Most adolescents and many adults believe the more notches you tie on your bow, the manlier you are. I have friends who still feel jealous of Abdu Mulaasi and have registered as voters for his ‘Ngenda Kusiba Farm party’.
Others smile at the guy who runs several women and frown at the male adult virgins. And some of the male virgins fear to declare their assets because many Africans associate multiple partners with sexual prowess.
But this is getting it wrong. The power of manhood is not in distributing sex. It is in resisting temptation to bite the bait. And the bigger the temptation you resist, the manlier you are. Sex is sweet and for men, the dominating sense of conquest builds one’s ego. But this means that whoever lets himself loose into the multiples of sex adventure has succumbed to the obvious temptation.
That is not strength. It is a weakness. A man who cannot say ‘No’ to an open opportunity for sex is not man enough. He is a weakling! He is as spineless as the drunkard who cannot leave an extra bottle.
When this workmate asks you to visit her at home and aggressively seduces you to bed with provocative wear, soft music, dim lighting, sexy voice and tears, you may hear an inner voice urging you not to let mankind and your own manhood down.
If you fail to let this cup pass, you will not be a victor; you will be a loser, a pathetic failure who could not control your own bodily urges.
The urge for sex is associated with the testosterone hormone. Testosterone is secreted in the testes of men and the ovaries of women.
It is the principal male sex hormone and plays key roles in enhanced libido. Among other things it helps maintain sex drive, the production of sperm cells and male hair patterns.
During adolescence, the body gets significant doses of testosterone that often takes over the driver’s seat to propel an individual like a rally car. When it stabilises, a layman says you have become an adult. But some people never grow. The urge to conquer and dominate through sex leads them on by a cord like slaves. When any woman can floor you, you are not a man!
In contemporary word, greatness is not in doing what anybody can do but in what fails many, what is said to be difficult and what is not obvious.
If a beautiful woman cannot find a secret number to decode your resistance, she will respect your manly ability to be resistant. In you she will see security and confidence.
For her, you will be the only building that can remain after an earthquake? So, if your saliva drops at the first provocative woman, don’t board a taxi of warriors; you are a weakling. Warriors don’t need sex to prove they are men.