Who wants to share a bed with a smelly person?

May 06, 2011

YOU’VE just returned from a romantic dinner with your partner. You’ve scored points so far - the dinner was just great, filled with laughter, smiles and unforgettable romantic moments.

Elizabeth Namazzi and Harriet Birungi

YOU’VE just returned from a romantic dinner with your partner. You’ve scored points so far - the dinner was just great, filled with laughter, smiles and unforgettable romantic moments.

As you open the door to your bedroom, you cannot help but sigh in anticipation of what is yet to come. And then, just when you think nothing can go wrong, you notice grey creatures on your partner’s groin. You are in shock as you move closer and touch just to make sure. Then it hits you. Your partner has pubic lice.

All excitement fades and all you can think of is how to keep as much distance as you can from him or her. And that reaction proves that romance is most appreciated when there are no inhibitions.

This means your romantic antics should never be inhibited by any part of your partner’s body - or yours for that matter. Never let it be said that your partner was put off because you had pubic lice or a smelly groin.

According to Dr. Vincent Karuhanga, a general practitioner at Friend’s Polyclinic, the groin area includes the penis, vagina and anus. He notes: “In intimate relationships, two bodies come together with various germs. As such, measures have to be taken to ensure germs are not spread by keeping proper hygiene, especially of the groin.”

But before the couple’s groins come into close contact, Karuhanga notes, a relationship must develop. “A relationship begins with a handshake, then passes via a kiss and ends up with sexual intercourse. If hands are not clean, they are likely to transmit diseases like common cold, influenza, diarrhoea, typhoid and worms.

“A kiss can transmit the hepatitis virus, common cold and influenza. And in rare circumstances HIV, while from sex, you can transmit anything from scabies to STDs. Therefore, hygiene in relationships should not be about pubic hygiene only, without talking about careful washing of hands with soap and brushing with a tooth brush and toothpaste.” He notes that circumcision should also not be taken lightly, because it is an added measure to cleanliness.

Some couples share towels, which should be okay if you both observe excellent hygiene. But if their hygiene practices are suspect, then sharing a towel becomes a good way to share bacteria.

George recalls a girlfriend he had once. “That girl,” he says, “was drop-dead beautiful. With one but. She would do anything not to shower - not even her private parts. I can count the times she showered during our three year relationship and this was not when she was in her periods or after we had sex.

“I still wonder how I spent three years with her, because she was just too much! I think I stayed with her for her looks, but I eventually decided that I could not marry someone like her,” George says.

And sad as it may sound, George’s girlfriend is not the only girl who loathes water. Out of the 10 guys we talked to, three confessed to having dated a girlfriend who was not too fond of bathing. All three threw out the girlfriends because, as Martin put it, “Who wants to sleep with a smelly woman?” he asks.

Toilet seats are another home for bacteria, so you are better off covering public toilet seats with toilet paper before sitting on them.

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