Smiling through the pain Â- A barmaid’s woes
Sep 06, 2011
<i>Waitresses or barmaids are on their feet for hours. Most are guaranteed bad days on the job. They are negatively labelled by members of respectable Ugandan society. Persistent sexual advances notwithstanding, theirs is a job of mistakes, tears, trials, exploitation and death…. But always with a
Waitresses or barmaids are on their feet for hours. Most are guaranteed bad days on the job. They are negatively labelled by members of respectable Ugandan society. Persistent sexual advances notwithstanding, theirs is a job of mistakes, tears, trials, exploitation and death…. But always with a smile!
By Alex Balimwikungu
By the sheer nature of their jobs, barmaids are supposed to smile at all times and always be polite. They are supposed to multitask and, worst of all, they are supposed to memorise faces to help them get the right order to the right customer.
Steven Nagula, a bar manager at Nanas Joint in Wampewo, Gayaza Road, admits that it is hard to find a barmaid, who is perfect at what they do. However, he admits that with on-job training and strict adherence to set rules, the job is seamless and enjoyable.
“I expect a barmaid to remember the names of regular patrons and their usual orders, maintain eye contact with customers and not appear distracted. Most of all, they should keep their cool even when rude remarks are thrown at them because this is a business,†he says.
Nagula admits that it is a stressful job, but insists that if any barmaid carried the strain of their personal life to work, he would not hesitate to give them a day off without pay.
“I expect a barmaid to try and make people laugh, as it creates a good atmosphere. Even if she is having a bad day, she should fake a smile just for the sake of the business,†he says.
According to Nagula, by the sheer nature of their work, barmaids work as part of a team to help business flow as smoothly as possible. Their main duties are to serve drinks and to collect money for the drinks they have served. In addition to these obvious duties, they have to balance cash receipts, clean bars, tables and work areas and calm rowdy patrons.
“It is true they are on their toes most of the time and occasionally serve as shock absorbers for any frustrated people, who insult and sometimes assault them, but it is a job. You know what to expect when you join. There is no room for pampering,†he says
Life of unsolicited sexual advances
It follows an all too common script. After two beers, in some cases five, even average looking waitresses tend to turn beautiful in the eyes of most drunkards. Through newly-acquired “beer gogglesâ€, plump waitresses are known to develop tiny waists and wide hips. Most minds go X-rated at this point.
Though many men will want to ascend their moral high horse to disassociate from barmaid liaisons, most men I have encountered in numerous bars would love to date or sleep with a local hot barmaid.
In some cases, you have as many as five men lewdly waiting for one waitress. As the night draws on, they engage in a sort of cold war, showing financial muscle in a desperate bid to impress her. One by one they drop off. The last man standing usually carries the ‘prey’ sometimes at cock crow. Waitresses are all too aware of this; do not blame some of them, especially in the kafundas to turn up seductively dressed. Cases abound of men getting killed in fights over barmaids
Caroline, a waitress at a roadside pub on Gayaza Road, tells a shocking tale of sexual harassment at the hands of employers and old men.
A mother at 17, the slightly built baby-faced young woman, who looks way older than her age, says there is a slight difference between being a housemaid and barmaid although with the latter you have slight control over who you sleep with. She lives with her two-year-old daughter.
“Most of the men I worked for as a housemaid defiled me. Even in the bars, it is the same with some bar managers. Some demand for sex before recruiting you. I know life as a barmaid is hard, but I prefer it here,†she opens up.
She works in a bar where all four girls retire to one room. It is for such abysmal living conditions that she accepted the advances of an old man, who promised to take care of her finances and pay rent. He did so for one month, got her pregnant and disappeared!
Older and wiser, she has learnt better coping mechanisms. She solicits for beer from regular patrons. Rather than drink, she stealthily cashes in on the beer.
“I can ask a patron for Smirnoff Black, which costs sh3,500 and stealthily pour myself a bottle of krest lemon that costs sh1,000 in a glass. Older patrons are more gullible. If he offers you four bottles of Smirnoff, you get a profit of sh10,000. Younger patrons are mean,†she candidly confesses.
Carol gets no salary, but she is paid off each beer and soda she serves clients. She gets sh100 off soda sold and sh300 for beer. On a good day, she makes a paltry sh4,000, but considers it a very good job.
Wrecked relationships and marriages
According to Clemence Byomuhangi of the East Africa Professional Counselling Institute in Bunga, whereas barmaids are candidates for marriage like any other women with a pulse, there are stereotypes against their success rate in marriages and relationships.
Barmaids grow up feeling unappreciated and often suffer a low self-esteem. As a result, most are callous, calculative and manipulative towards their partners and children.
“True, there is that odd successful marriage involving barmaids, but there are strong cases of suspicion, lack of respect for the man and outright infidelity. I have seen a case where a woman married three different men at the same time and pulled it off for sometime,†she says.
Byomuhangi says when they set out to work, they have men flirting with them all the time, which makes them immune to real sentiments.
“Even as a husband, complimenting her at times means nothing. She hears it every night and tends to become immune to it. When she has had a bad day at work, she will likely mete the frustrations on you. Most join as good and loving people, but the nature of their job reduces them to wrecks,†she opines.
By Alex Balimwikungu
By the sheer nature of their jobs, barmaids are supposed to smile at all times and always be polite. They are supposed to multitask and, worst of all, they are supposed to memorise faces to help them get the right order to the right customer.
Steven Nagula, a bar manager at Nanas Joint in Wampewo, Gayaza Road, admits that it is hard to find a barmaid, who is perfect at what they do. However, he admits that with on-job training and strict adherence to set rules, the job is seamless and enjoyable.
“I expect a barmaid to remember the names of regular patrons and their usual orders, maintain eye contact with customers and not appear distracted. Most of all, they should keep their cool even when rude remarks are thrown at them because this is a business,†he says.
Nagula admits that it is a stressful job, but insists that if any barmaid carried the strain of their personal life to work, he would not hesitate to give them a day off without pay.
“I expect a barmaid to try and make people laugh, as it creates a good atmosphere. Even if she is having a bad day, she should fake a smile just for the sake of the business,†he says.
According to Nagula, by the sheer nature of their work, barmaids work as part of a team to help business flow as smoothly as possible. Their main duties are to serve drinks and to collect money for the drinks they have served. In addition to these obvious duties, they have to balance cash receipts, clean bars, tables and work areas and calm rowdy patrons.
“It is true they are on their toes most of the time and occasionally serve as shock absorbers for any frustrated people, who insult and sometimes assault them, but it is a job. You know what to expect when you join. There is no room for pampering,†he says
Life of unsolicited sexual advances
It follows an all too common script. After two beers, in some cases five, even average looking waitresses tend to turn beautiful in the eyes of most drunkards. Through newly-acquired “beer gogglesâ€, plump waitresses are known to develop tiny waists and wide hips. Most minds go X-rated at this point.
Though many men will want to ascend their moral high horse to disassociate from barmaid liaisons, most men I have encountered in numerous bars would love to date or sleep with a local hot barmaid.
In some cases, you have as many as five men lewdly waiting for one waitress. As the night draws on, they engage in a sort of cold war, showing financial muscle in a desperate bid to impress her. One by one they drop off. The last man standing usually carries the ‘prey’ sometimes at cock crow. Waitresses are all too aware of this; do not blame some of them, especially in the kafundas to turn up seductively dressed. Cases abound of men getting killed in fights over barmaids
Caroline, a waitress at a roadside pub on Gayaza Road, tells a shocking tale of sexual harassment at the hands of employers and old men.
A mother at 17, the slightly built baby-faced young woman, who looks way older than her age, says there is a slight difference between being a housemaid and barmaid although with the latter you have slight control over who you sleep with. She lives with her two-year-old daughter.
“Most of the men I worked for as a housemaid defiled me. Even in the bars, it is the same with some bar managers. Some demand for sex before recruiting you. I know life as a barmaid is hard, but I prefer it here,†she opens up.
She works in a bar where all four girls retire to one room. It is for such abysmal living conditions that she accepted the advances of an old man, who promised to take care of her finances and pay rent. He did so for one month, got her pregnant and disappeared!
Older and wiser, she has learnt better coping mechanisms. She solicits for beer from regular patrons. Rather than drink, she stealthily cashes in on the beer.
“I can ask a patron for Smirnoff Black, which costs sh3,500 and stealthily pour myself a bottle of krest lemon that costs sh1,000 in a glass. Older patrons are more gullible. If he offers you four bottles of Smirnoff, you get a profit of sh10,000. Younger patrons are mean,†she candidly confesses.
Carol gets no salary, but she is paid off each beer and soda she serves clients. She gets sh100 off soda sold and sh300 for beer. On a good day, she makes a paltry sh4,000, but considers it a very good job.
Wrecked relationships and marriages
According to Clemence Byomuhangi of the East Africa Professional Counselling Institute in Bunga, whereas barmaids are candidates for marriage like any other women with a pulse, there are stereotypes against their success rate in marriages and relationships.
Barmaids grow up feeling unappreciated and often suffer a low self-esteem. As a result, most are callous, calculative and manipulative towards their partners and children.
“True, there is that odd successful marriage involving barmaids, but there are strong cases of suspicion, lack of respect for the man and outright infidelity. I have seen a case where a woman married three different men at the same time and pulled it off for sometime,†she says.
Byomuhangi says when they set out to work, they have men flirting with them all the time, which makes them immune to real sentiments.
“Even as a husband, complimenting her at times means nothing. She hears it every night and tends to become immune to it. When she has had a bad day at work, she will likely mete the frustrations on you. Most join as good and loving people, but the nature of their job reduces them to wrecks,†she opines.