Know why your child makes mistakes - experts

PARENTING

Usually when a child makes a mistake, some parents are quick to blame the child and even spank the child which usually does not solve any problem but inflict pain on the child.

However, experts say that before a parent blames or spanks a child, it's important that they first understand why the child has made a mistake. But one wonders how this can be possible

Create a good communication mechanism between you and your child

Lydia Nyesigomwe , the director parenting Uganda notes that some parents are found of yelling, shouting and barking at their children thinking that it's the only way they can speak to them and they understand.

That is wrong, speak to your child in a good way and that way they will know you are their friend and will feel free to explain things to you. When you bark, you scare them and out of fear, they might end up making more mistakes because they definitely did not understand you.

Control your emotions

She notes that no matter what the child has done, it's important that parents learn to control their emotions and let their children speak. Call your child and have dialogue as mother and son/daughter.

"Try to ask them why they behave in a certain manner which is not good and while asking show that you are concerned and willing to help as a parent and a friend, this might help you get reasons as to why your child makes mistakes from time to time," Nyesigomwe says.

Engage in doing things with your child

Lynnette Apondi the headteacher of Seeta Kindergarten notes that parents today have become workaholics that they barely have time for their children.In doing this, they miss out on knowing their children's' weaknesses and strengths.

However, when a parent directly gets involved in the child's day to day activities, they get to know how their child responds to certain things and what draws their attention more.

She advises parents to spend more time with their children so that they learn what their children are passionate about and what attracts them more to do certain things better than others.

This will help you know why your child makes mistakes and you will devise means of helping your child.

Make your child your friend

Apondi notes that it is human and normal to make mistakes but this fact is not clear to some parents that when they expect their children to act in a certain manner and the children do otherwise, it becomes an offence.

She says parents ought to make their children their friends so that a child can freely interact and explain why he/she made a mistake. She adds that parents should also learn to appreciate their children when they have done things the right way.

Check yourself

Apondi notes that sometimes children tend to copy what they see their parents doing and in the end, they get in trouble. But what if you blame a child for doing something that she /he does to emulate the example of mummy and daddy.

Well this might be embarrassing but its time parents mind what they do in the presence of their children. This will save you shame especially if your child does it in public.