Consider "military families" in this year of the family

By Fr. Fred Jenga

It is good news to hear that the Government of Uganda designated the Year 2017 as the "Year of the Family." It was long overdue, but everything has its own right timing and this may be the time for us as a country to reflect upon family life and how we can work on building strong and healthy families. I would like to highlight an often forgotten category of families in Uganda - the families of our men in uniform particularly the army.

Have you ever stopped to ask yourself how families of our men and women in uniform look like? Who are their spouses? Where do they live? Who are their children? Where do they go to school? How often do the spouses get to see their partners? When do the children get to see and spend time with their father or mother? What happens to the children when mother and father serve in the forces and both have to be deployed for service? These kinds of questions are not only difficult for civilians like myself, but they are tough for anyone whose spouse or parent serves in the forces.

I am an avid reader of biographies and autobiographies of Ugandans and it is interesting to read autobiographies of Ugandans who have been part of Uganda's political struggles. I have looked at Sowing the Mustard Seed by President Museveni, My Life's Journey of Janet Museveni, Uganda's Revolution 1979-1986 by General Pecos Kutesa, From the Cross to the Gun by the late Brigadier Bernard Rwehururu, Impassioned for Freedom by the late Eriya Kategaya, and the Agony of Power by General Matayo Kyaligonza.

One element that catches your eye is the toll service in the forces can take on the family. In Sowing the Mustard president Museveni mentions a time he rejoined his family that was in exile in Europe then but because he had been away for a long time he entered the house and "little" Muhoozi Kainerugaba did not recognize who the "stranger" was. Muhoozi continued on playing with the television or the videogames that he was busy with. It is such epiphanies that need to wake us up to the realities of the effect of service in the forces on family life. This is not just an experience with the Musevenis, it is a shared experience of most people who have served in the forces. 

The structure and the up-rootedness characteristic of the army make it very difficult for a lot of serving officers to get married and settle down. This leaves them with the dangerous option of simply having ‘relationships' almost at every duty station they are assigned to, in the process increasing the likelihood of contracting diseases. To officers who get married, the burden on the spouse and the children brought on by an absentee spouse or parent is immense. Army officers have to be away from their families for long periods of time on training or serving on missions, leaving only one adult to run the family. We have to question the emotional impact this has on the lives of the children and the strength of the marriage relationship. 

There are also emotional challenges army officers bring back to their families after spending extended periods of time on battle fields shooting adui or being shot at. I have senior army and police officers I am close to and I always worry about their families. When such officers return home after tours of duty, what impact does the nature of their work have on their marriage and parental relationship?

Part of the celebration of the national Year of the Family needs to include research on family life in Uganda from different angles, or institutions such as the army, and proposals made on how we can move forward. We need to extend this year beyond bivulu or marches, slogans and banners, bumper-stickers and flyers - we have solid issues to deal with.  As someone once said, "nations go the way of the families" - strong families mean strong countries. Over to you Pius Bigirimana, the Permanent Secretary at the Ministry of Gender, Labour, and Social Development!

The writer is a Catholic priest and doctoral student of The University of Texas at Austin