What should you do when some guy takes your wife or girlfriend away? Hands up!
Kakeeto: (whose wife was taken by Pastor Kitakufe of Kampala) Go to court and stop the wedding.
Baguma: (whose wife was taken by Pastor Safari of Kyenjojo) Go to the Police and get him arrested.
Rugunda: (whose wife was taken by Ngarambe, a Rwandan diplomat) Get security men to storm the hotel.
Wayne Bridge: (whose girlfriend was taken by his captain John Terry) Donâ€™t shake his hand.
It is clear to men that the biggest slap in the face is when your woman votes with her feet and you are left to see her back.
The guy who is seeing her front is supposed to be a better lover, a better breed, a better man. In the natural hierarchical struggle of mankind, that is bad news. No, terrible news!
To be lenient, a man who takes your woman deserves to die.
Animals follow that to the letter - with limited success. If that was religiously followed among humans, there would be no man on earth.
Most good women are usually taken, you have to edge out the other man to grab the seat, just as it is done in politics. And blood can sometimes show presence wherever these instances are played out, except where some pastor deploys policemen.
But think again: In a struggle for supremacy as men, when a guy snatches your wife, do you earn points by putting on sack cloth and wailing on the streets?
You donâ€™t! Do you refuse to shake his hand like Wayne did to Terry last Saturday? No, you donâ€™t! Do you grab your sword and head for a duel with him? No! Never! That is like crowning him total victor.
And again, you cannot force a woman to love you. Neither should you risk your life fighting for a person who has voted you out.
What really matters is your position in the masculine hierarchy, and it is still possible you can maintain it among your peers and before your rival.
To do that, you have to behave like you are not devastated by your womanâ€™s departure for another guy. If possible, show relief and look as if it was good riddance.
Bury all remorse and, if you are Wayne, shake Terryâ€™s hand and invite him for a tips-for-a-beer evening where you explain how the â€˜prize he thinks he has taken is far from good, even if it looked good from far.
To the world, the â€˜victorâ€™ will look like your dumping ground and that will affect his standing on the hierarchy.
He snatches your woman, you snatch his victory. It is such a sweet revenge, worth the internal struggle to pretend you are not hurt.
With time, the hurt will go and, like Sebaggala, you will be president in your own party.