How do you handle it?

By Vision Reporter

Added 27th August 2009 03:00 AM

TO be honest, I always get attention from men. But I respect myself. In Uganda, men respect married women. Since I am a married woman, I don’t take men’s compliments serious because if you smile back, he can use that as grounds to point out his feelin

Susan Muhwezi, presidential advisor, AGOA
To be honest, I always get attention from men. But I respect myself. In Uganda, men respect married women. Since I am a married woman, I don’t take men’s compliments serious because if you smile back, he can use that as grounds to point out his feelings towards you.

When a man tells me I look pretty I recommend him to tell that to my husband, because my husband will be happy to hear that other men appreciate my beauty. Even before I got married, I was a respectful woman; so many men respected
me and feared to approach me.

Nablia Naggayi, Woman MP, Kampala
It is part of life for every woman to be disturbed by men. Since I grew up with boys, I find it natural to have men around me. However, falling in love with any man is the last thing on my mind. I always tell them that I am busy; I have no time for such people. It was one gentleman who once helped me to access an ATM.

After three days, he called me requesting for an outing. I kept on postponing the date until he gave up. And those days I used to behave
in a primitive way, I could not allow hugs from men. So men feared me.

Angela Katatumba, singer
For three years, a certain man
called me everyday, promising
me the world if I agreed to be his wife. At times he made 24 calls and sent 15 SMSs after that. He had a way of coming out of nowhere and confronting me on the street. He told me that Allah had told him that I was his wife and he was willing to fight for my love. When he found out that I was dating someone, he threatened to spray him with bullets.

Fortunately, my brothers had
advised me to buy a phone with the ability to record phone calls. I reported to the Police and was shocked when the man told them we had a domestic crisis.

Fortunately, the Police warned him to stop, which he did after we threatened to expose his weird behaviour. After only two weeks anotherman picked up from where the first had stopped. He sends several verses from the Song of Solomon in the Bible.

My brothers have demanded that he stops but he has refused to. Not even lodging a complaint at CPS has helped matters.

Juliana Kanyomozi, singer
I find the way men make passes at me very insulting. I guess things are slightly different for us as women in the entertainment industry. When a man sees me wriggle my waist on stage, he thinks I am an object of pleasure. If I can entertain crowds, he imagines I would be explosive entertaining him in private.

So you get all sorts of invitations to dinners. Some call, others send emissaries. They imagine I will be moved by that. So I do not normally feed their obsession. I tell them straight that I am not interested. If you want us to be friends or are calling for business, please do.

But if you are calling about personal stuff, please do not call again. It works for me every time because I let it down easy. They never try again. I think the problem with many girls is that they like to toy with men’s feelings; giving them mixed signals. That can become a problem.

Beatrice Anywar, Woman MP, Kitgum
Handling men? That is a difficult question. Why don’t you ask MPs Suzan Nakawuki and Nabira Naggayi? I understand they disturb
them a lot. Men will always poke their nose to any woman. I grew up a principled girl.

So I never had room for boys. I have always been like these strong born-agains. Men were my worst enemies, but these days I first tell them to gauge if they can afford me. I give them a criteria to follow.

I set very high standards for myself. A man has to first show me his academic qualifications. I want to find out if he is a gentleman, but most men are not, so they end up giving up on me.

Santa Azo, CEO, Arapapa models
I make my point loud and clear to any man I have no business with. I express lack of interest at the first sight. Since I am very vocal, I find it
easy to express myself.

And if I say no to a man, I stand my ground; I do not even use body language. I do not take favours from men. I avoid showing them that I am vulnerable. If a man approaches me, I humbly start counselling
him. This trick has helped me since college.

Naomi Mao, wife to Gulu chairman, Nobert Mao
Oops! I do not know what to say. I am principled. My conduct just puts them off. Since I am serious, many men who do not have the potential just back off. Men are afraid of me because they do not know how to handle a serious lady. I respect people so I expect men to respect me.

Maggie Kigozi, executive director, Uganda Investment Authority
(Laughs). I do not get attention
from men. Maybe there are men interested in me, but no one approaches me.

How do you handle it?

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