As a pastor it must have been easy for you to get a wife
No way. No matter what you are, it is always difficult to get the right partner. You may get crushes, but it does not mean those are the right people. Crushes are usually based on physical beauty, which can disappear any time. A marriage partner must have long lasting qualities. It took me some time to propose to her. I had to first study her and understand her very well before proposing and marrying her.
What do you do about crushes then?
First of all, it is natural to have a crush. It is admiring what is before you and it is not a sin. Secondly, it is good because it tests the strength of your faith. It also reminds me of Godâ€™s good work and purpose. I just bow and thank Him for that.
So, did you get a crush on Athina the first time you saw her?
It may not have been a crush, but she impressed me the first time I saw her. She was lovely, sociable and behaved as a mature woman and yet she was young. I did not talk to her for a year and it was after I confirmed her personality that I approached her.
How did you win her over?
I told her how I had been studying her for a long time and that I had confirmed that she had the qualities I wanted in a woman. She asked me for time to think about it, but with an encouraging smile. I waited and never bothered her until she told me that it was okay. I never used money or favours. She was ministering and was spiritual like me, so we had a common cause and needed nothing apart from being good Christians.
What would you do if you caught her in adultery?
Since our marriage is based on a Christian background, I would follow scriptures not emotions. But I do not believe she can do it. Surely, what would Athina look for in another man? I think I would have detected such queer behaviour in her before.
Would you tell her if some woman was seducing you?
Why not? What I can do is to invite the two of them and reveal the otherâ€™s intention before counselling her. Transparency makes life better and provides quicker solutions to problems.
What have you learnt in marriage?
That man and woman are interdependent. Much as a man needs a woman; no woman can live happily without a man.
Do you like it when she kneels to greet or give you something?
Of course. I do. Every man would want his wife to be submissive. However, I never force her to do anything.
She knows what is good for us.
Your husband has strong powers that make people fall. Do you feel this power in your marriage?
No, because I am also a pastor. I am anointed and that power can no longer fling me down.
As a teenager, who was your ideal man?
I never thought about it. When I became an adult, all I asked God for was to give me the right man; a God-fearing man and who would not make me regret. I must say, Muwanguzi is the man I asked God to give me. He is loving, caring and a true Christian.
So, how did you get him?
It was through ministering. I used to go preaching to many places. When he proposed to me, I asked for time, I wanted to test his sincerity. Three years later, we agreed to relate and wedded. Waiting has made our marriage very strong because we first studied each otherâ€™s weaknesses.
Does it mean you never had any boyfriend before?
I was not in for the so-called â€˜sampling.â€™ Muwanguzi is my first boyfriend.
May be you were anti-social?
No. I had many female friends and men, who are still my friends.
Did you get any advice before you got married?
Yeah and a lot of it; the best one was from my pastor. He advised me to follow my heart and not pay attention to what people say. As long as I knew what I wanted, there was no need to worry about peopleâ€™s ill talk.
What do you love cooking for your husband?
I am a Mutooro from the Batuku clan, but my husband is a typical Muganda who likes mashed matooke, black tea and roasted groundnuts. I always ensure that these are on the table most of the time.
Does he advise you on what to cook?
No. He has no time and he trusts me to do my responsibility. It may be regarded as rude to tell a wife what you want to eat. It should be her task to find out what pleases you.
Would you leave if you found out that he was going out with another woman?
That would not be wise. The right thing is to show him where he went wrong and encourage him to change. Secondly, a satisfied man rarely meanders. If such a thing happens, you revisit love notes and make sure love is back on the right track. But I do not believe a pastor can do that.
Have you ever felt jealous?
It is common for a pastorâ€™s wife. It is a challenge because there are many women who only come to tempt him. I need to minister and fight evil-minded characters - I mean spiritual fight. I need no excuse when I am protecting my husband, even God gets jealous when his people go astray.
When he annoys you, how long does it take you to make up?
I always make efforts to make up whether it is him or me in the wrong. Above all, a woman is expected to submit to her husband.
What is the secret in him?
First of all, he is my best friend. Secondly, he behaves as if he is my father. I believe that is what every woman would want in a man.
Muwanguzi is the man I asked God to give me