Suited for Love - The Ahimbisibwes
Dec 09, 2006
BILLY Robert Ahimbisibwe is the owner of Select Garments shops. He has been married to Susan Ahimbisibwe for 10 years and they have three children. They talked to <b>Pidson Kareire</b> about managing their marriage.
BILLY Robert Ahimbisibwe is the owner of Select Garments shops. He has been married to Susan Ahimbisibwe for 10 years and they have three children. They talked to Pidson Kareire about managing their marriage.
Susan
QUESTION: How did you feel leaving for studies after only two years in marriage?
ANSWER: I felt bad but I had hope and determination. I knew that one day I would come back with an achievement. While I was there, I used to make phone calls so often. In the US, long-distance phone calls are cheaper than in Uganda.
Didn’t you ever think of losing him to other women?
No. I have never suspected him; even before leaving for the US, I had studied him and knew his character. He is a staunch catholic and principled. Women do not take much of his time.
What is the worst thing about being a loaded (rich) couple?
Sometimes you do not get enough time for your family because you have so many things to plan and do all the time. Children do not get enough time with you. Fatigue becomes the order of the day and this may create marital problems.
Are you saying money is a problem?
To some extent. When people think that you are rich, they distance themselves from you because of inferiority complex. Others think you are not helping them.
Many will hate you even when you have done nothing to them. Friends will surprise you by turning against you thinking you have a lot but you are not sharing with them.
Others decide to reveal to the public whatever they know about you from childhood.
Does money give you all the love you need?
I am really contented, but I don’t think it’s because of money. Honestly, he is a good husband.
Money is a recent thing; our love existed before this money you are talking about. Money complements love; it should not be a priority.
Is it true rich women are proud and rude?
I do not think that is true. It depends on personality. If someone is naturally rude, she will always be rude whether poor or rich. Money and behaviour are two separate things.
Is there anything you have not defeated with money?
Definitely. Economists say that human needs are insatiable and I am not different. There are more personal things I would want to achieve.
What do you do when Ahimbisibwe upsets you?
I use communication to quell my anger. I talk about it and do not hold on to anger and that has actually worked for me.
As a daughter of a judge, do you use law to solve marital problems or money does it for you?
Not at all. It is mutual understanding. We always solve it between ourselves.
Do you approve of his flamboyant lifestyle of driving customised car number plates?
I have no problem with that because it is a showbiz trend and our customers, in a way, make us behave or do so. Society needs a reflection of what you are doing.
For instance, they will ask, “This man sells suits but never wears any, what is wrong with him?†This will make you become smarter than before.
We have no reason to suspect each other
Robert
Question: How often do you celebrate your wedding anniversary?
Answer: We celebrated the first two years, then Susan had to leave for the US where she stayed for four years.
We shall be celebrating 10 years of marriage in April next year.
What special things do you do for love?
I do not buy love. I give gifts when it is necessary, but not to impress. If I give a gift, I do it in appreciation and not for a favour.
What is the worst thing that has happened to you in ten years?
When she was away in the US, the world became so small to me. We had just been married for only two years and off she left. It was a bad experience.
Does your wife like your flamboyant lifestyle?
I do not know, but I think, she has no problem with it. Anyway, she always congratulates me whenever I buy a car. She respects my interests because whatever I do is for a purpose; she knows I am not extravagant.
Doesn’t that attract many women to you?
Most women know there is no space for them. You see, women come to you after discovering your weakness.
If they find you are loose, they will turn you into their field but if they know you are strict and happily married, there is no way they will come to you.
Doesn’t your frequent travel schedule raise suspicion?
No. She knows I travel for business. Even when I am abroad, I use my roaming mobile phone number to communicate to her. We call often because we miss each other.
But most men confuse their spouses that way and go ahead to cheat while on business trips?
I am not among those ones. If anything, it is their business. We have never suspected each other. We have been together for 10 years. Our marriage is solid and such behaviour cannot arise.
How do you deal with business and pleasure?
We work together but there is a distinction between love and work. I use my time diligently. I don’t drink, therefore I have time to be at home.
I only go out for functions that I sponsor and if I go out without her, I don’t drink or eat anything because I know she is at home preparing for me.
What about your love of cars and the wife?
I love my wife; cars are a means of transport and they can be bought at any time. It is really hard to get a wife. You may say that there are many women but not all women are good wives.
Susan
QUESTION: How did you feel leaving for studies after only two years in marriage?
ANSWER: I felt bad but I had hope and determination. I knew that one day I would come back with an achievement. While I was there, I used to make phone calls so often. In the US, long-distance phone calls are cheaper than in Uganda.
Didn’t you ever think of losing him to other women?
No. I have never suspected him; even before leaving for the US, I had studied him and knew his character. He is a staunch catholic and principled. Women do not take much of his time.
What is the worst thing about being a loaded (rich) couple?
Sometimes you do not get enough time for your family because you have so many things to plan and do all the time. Children do not get enough time with you. Fatigue becomes the order of the day and this may create marital problems.
Are you saying money is a problem?
To some extent. When people think that you are rich, they distance themselves from you because of inferiority complex. Others think you are not helping them.
Many will hate you even when you have done nothing to them. Friends will surprise you by turning against you thinking you have a lot but you are not sharing with them.
Others decide to reveal to the public whatever they know about you from childhood.
Does money give you all the love you need?
I am really contented, but I don’t think it’s because of money. Honestly, he is a good husband.
Money is a recent thing; our love existed before this money you are talking about. Money complements love; it should not be a priority.
Is it true rich women are proud and rude?
I do not think that is true. It depends on personality. If someone is naturally rude, she will always be rude whether poor or rich. Money and behaviour are two separate things.
Is there anything you have not defeated with money?
Definitely. Economists say that human needs are insatiable and I am not different. There are more personal things I would want to achieve.
What do you do when Ahimbisibwe upsets you?
I use communication to quell my anger. I talk about it and do not hold on to anger and that has actually worked for me.
As a daughter of a judge, do you use law to solve marital problems or money does it for you?
Not at all. It is mutual understanding. We always solve it between ourselves.
Do you approve of his flamboyant lifestyle of driving customised car number plates?
I have no problem with that because it is a showbiz trend and our customers, in a way, make us behave or do so. Society needs a reflection of what you are doing.
For instance, they will ask, “This man sells suits but never wears any, what is wrong with him?†This will make you become smarter than before.
We have no reason to suspect each other
Robert
Question: How often do you celebrate your wedding anniversary?
Answer: We celebrated the first two years, then Susan had to leave for the US where she stayed for four years.
We shall be celebrating 10 years of marriage in April next year.
What special things do you do for love?
I do not buy love. I give gifts when it is necessary, but not to impress. If I give a gift, I do it in appreciation and not for a favour.
What is the worst thing that has happened to you in ten years?
When she was away in the US, the world became so small to me. We had just been married for only two years and off she left. It was a bad experience.
Does your wife like your flamboyant lifestyle?
I do not know, but I think, she has no problem with it. Anyway, she always congratulates me whenever I buy a car. She respects my interests because whatever I do is for a purpose; she knows I am not extravagant.
Doesn’t that attract many women to you?
Most women know there is no space for them. You see, women come to you after discovering your weakness.
If they find you are loose, they will turn you into their field but if they know you are strict and happily married, there is no way they will come to you.
Doesn’t your frequent travel schedule raise suspicion?
No. She knows I travel for business. Even when I am abroad, I use my roaming mobile phone number to communicate to her. We call often because we miss each other.
But most men confuse their spouses that way and go ahead to cheat while on business trips?
I am not among those ones. If anything, it is their business. We have never suspected each other. We have been together for 10 years. Our marriage is solid and such behaviour cannot arise.
How do you deal with business and pleasure?
We work together but there is a distinction between love and work. I use my time diligently. I don’t drink, therefore I have time to be at home.
I only go out for functions that I sponsor and if I go out without her, I don’t drink or eat anything because I know she is at home preparing for me.
What about your love of cars and the wife?
I love my wife; cars are a means of transport and they can be bought at any time. It is really hard to get a wife. You may say that there are many women but not all women are good wives.