To UEDCL, I’m indeed sorry
Feb 18, 2005
I am here, stuck with a front seat ticket to the Vagina Monologues. I don’t know whether to ask the Media Council for a refund since they have put the monologues on ice. How do you stop something from having a monologue? This is inconceivable!
I am here, stuck with a front seat ticket to the Vagina Monologues. I don’t know whether to ask the Media Council for a refund since they have put the monologues on ice. How do you stop something from having a monologue? This is inconceivable!
As I shed tears over the fate of Vagina Monologues, some pathetic creatures that sit at Amber House were at it again. Bob Kisubi was on his soapbox, blasting away on four barrels. He accused me of being a pathetic liar, which by the way I don’t deny because nga I lie at times. I even spice my lies up with juju to make them more believable!
When I saw Bob’s rebuttal, I was so happy that I even ordered for another beer because for once, someone in UEDCL had done something right! It is not easy to identify my ballistic lies. But Bob unraveled this one! I had claimed that UEDCL employs monkeys yet it’s not true. Wallai, I have researched on this and I can assure you that there is not a single monkey at UEDCL. I feel so bad about it that I would like to apologise to all the chaps at UEDCL for calling them monkeys.
Mr. Kisubi, I feel like crying whenever I think about the fact that I falsely accused your staff for chopping off my electricity. I swear, I will never use bad words like ‘disconnect’, ‘cut off’ and ‘dwanzie’ again. How could I have claimed that your chaps cut me off, when we all know that there’s nothing to cut off since the water levels, in the lake, went down.
I do understand how one would feel, especially if they were referred to as an animal that is not only so ugly, but also climbs trees and electricity poles! I dearly apologise to UEDCL and I swear this is from the heart of my botto..... sorry I mean bottom of my heart!
How could I bring an otherwise good company into disrepute by claiming that they are inefficient? I know some of the most arrogant bastards chill in this company, but who was I to bring this out. It takes years to build a name and reputation, how could I defame a company that has for the last donkey years steadily supplied surmountable proportions of darkness?
How could I compare the ballistic services these twerps give us to pathetic service providers like national water and utl? I am really sorry for this, I know UEDCL sends their bills on time. I know this because, the last bill they sent me on Sunday had a December date. They are so efficient; they make ‘snail pace’ sound fast!
The last time I called them dwanzies, Kisubi went haywire. this time, I am lost for words as to what to call them. I am really trying to avoid an F-word. Do you know that after Kisubi’s missive, where he categorically states that my last outstanding was sh57.606, which I paid, I received a bill on Sunday morning stating that my outstanding is now sh143,000. I am going to see a stress consultant and UEDCL (Uganda Extremely Disorganised Company Limited), will foot the bill. I swear to deliver this bill to them in time!
I thought Nsaba Buturo was the worst thing that happened to this country (how does he fight the monologues) but, I now think otherwise! Seriously, these chaps need to learn from other service providers like national water, who are so efficient that it even gets annoying. Over to you Mr. KisUEBi!
Ends
As I shed tears over the fate of Vagina Monologues, some pathetic creatures that sit at Amber House were at it again. Bob Kisubi was on his soapbox, blasting away on four barrels. He accused me of being a pathetic liar, which by the way I don’t deny because nga I lie at times. I even spice my lies up with juju to make them more believable!
When I saw Bob’s rebuttal, I was so happy that I even ordered for another beer because for once, someone in UEDCL had done something right! It is not easy to identify my ballistic lies. But Bob unraveled this one! I had claimed that UEDCL employs monkeys yet it’s not true. Wallai, I have researched on this and I can assure you that there is not a single monkey at UEDCL. I feel so bad about it that I would like to apologise to all the chaps at UEDCL for calling them monkeys.
Mr. Kisubi, I feel like crying whenever I think about the fact that I falsely accused your staff for chopping off my electricity. I swear, I will never use bad words like ‘disconnect’, ‘cut off’ and ‘dwanzie’ again. How could I have claimed that your chaps cut me off, when we all know that there’s nothing to cut off since the water levels, in the lake, went down.
I do understand how one would feel, especially if they were referred to as an animal that is not only so ugly, but also climbs trees and electricity poles! I dearly apologise to UEDCL and I swear this is from the heart of my botto..... sorry I mean bottom of my heart!
How could I bring an otherwise good company into disrepute by claiming that they are inefficient? I know some of the most arrogant bastards chill in this company, but who was I to bring this out. It takes years to build a name and reputation, how could I defame a company that has for the last donkey years steadily supplied surmountable proportions of darkness?
How could I compare the ballistic services these twerps give us to pathetic service providers like national water and utl? I am really sorry for this, I know UEDCL sends their bills on time. I know this because, the last bill they sent me on Sunday had a December date. They are so efficient; they make ‘snail pace’ sound fast!
The last time I called them dwanzies, Kisubi went haywire. this time, I am lost for words as to what to call them. I am really trying to avoid an F-word. Do you know that after Kisubi’s missive, where he categorically states that my last outstanding was sh57.606, which I paid, I received a bill on Sunday morning stating that my outstanding is now sh143,000. I am going to see a stress consultant and UEDCL (Uganda Extremely Disorganised Company Limited), will foot the bill. I swear to deliver this bill to them in time!
I thought Nsaba Buturo was the worst thing that happened to this country (how does he fight the monologues) but, I now think otherwise! Seriously, these chaps need to learn from other service providers like national water, who are so efficient that it even gets annoying. Over to you Mr. KisUEBi!
Ends