End love gracefully
Jul 06, 2005
And she walked up to him and said their love had to end. They laughed about it and resolved to remain friends, happily ever after.<br>This is one story line that gives the author a label of insanity because no one expects Kazibwe to roll her eyes at the engineer before kissing him fare-thee-well.
And she walked up to him and said their love had to end. They laughed about it and resolved to remain friends, happily ever after.
This is one story line that gives the author a label of insanity because no one expects Kazibwe to roll her eyes at the engineer before kissing him fare-thee-well.
We do not break relationships the same way we make them. Even by the end of today, some loves will explode in thin air leaving crushed souls in the debris with the 51 anti-kisanja activists. I hope this consoles Mr Engineer. We all break hearts. The only exceptions are those who abstain, unless they are Col Bogere of UPDF.
But should that be the reward you give someone who has opened up a soul for you? I know you cannot force an affair to move on when the tyres have no pressure, but there is a way you can abandon ship without being blunt. If you declare it over, pick your pants and leave, you are likely to get a dagger planted in your back.
Therefore, get out your notepads. I want to show you how you can put asunder what God has joined and leave friendship along the trail. You can end a love gracefully. And you should. Pick a leaf from M7. That guy could have declared himself a life president the Amin way. But he made it seem like a decision he is contemplating under duress!
What with the Parliament (and 10 of them are army MPs, officially armed) and several district councillors threatening to drag him to court for being selfish enough to return to his lucrative farming!
So, spread the blame to your parents, your emotional confusion, your getting sa-ved, your patriotism, etc to log off without crushing many bones. Let the ex-in-the-making know they are okay and lovable as people, that you like them as friends and will never forget their contribution to your life. (After all, it is usually true anyway). But due to public demand,....
Some people do so by pretending they are the aggrieved persons. “I still love you, but have failed to come to terms with the way you support the third term! Maybe I am stupid, but...â€. Use ambiguous, but diplomatic words like ‘failure to reconcile the events with your spiritual disposition’ - whatever that means.
It helps you to avoid giving a tangible reason, which can always be shot down, leaving you naked and exposed. If you say, “somehow, our chemistry has failed to connect...†how can the ‘bereaved’ argue that it connects? He can’t! But remember to end it with “I feel so bad because there is nothing wrong with you. Oh God: I will miss you!†This is just hot air, but formidable. You withdraw without injuring your ex’s self esteem.
And please, unless your ex deserves it (he is a bully, she is unfaithful) ending gracefully demands that you desist from blaming him/her. If it is you who wants to move on and your ex-to-be is dug in, don’t look for flimsy reasons from his camp. Just blame yourself and apologise. And try to minimise the damage on the part of ex.
Do not break the news on his/her special day like a birthday, Valentine’s Day, Christmas etc because these days will haunt them by reminding them of your ‘No’ vote. If you have got any expensive gifts from ex, offer to return them. Break up cleanly and completely, not partially. Don’t give ex any vain hope of resuscitating the affair. Looking back is not only cruel, but it can turn you into a pillar of salt.
Break the news in a public place where emotions are more likely to be contained. The pleading will be less and the confines of a bedroom may not be the safest place. Brethren, whether you are breaking up or being broken up with, the key word to remember is ‘grace’. This lover you want to crown your ex has made great contributions to your love life and even when your parliament denies this person unlimited terms, it is honourable to leave in peace when you are signing out.
Don’t say I did not warn you.
Ends
This is one story line that gives the author a label of insanity because no one expects Kazibwe to roll her eyes at the engineer before kissing him fare-thee-well.
We do not break relationships the same way we make them. Even by the end of today, some loves will explode in thin air leaving crushed souls in the debris with the 51 anti-kisanja activists. I hope this consoles Mr Engineer. We all break hearts. The only exceptions are those who abstain, unless they are Col Bogere of UPDF.
But should that be the reward you give someone who has opened up a soul for you? I know you cannot force an affair to move on when the tyres have no pressure, but there is a way you can abandon ship without being blunt. If you declare it over, pick your pants and leave, you are likely to get a dagger planted in your back.
Therefore, get out your notepads. I want to show you how you can put asunder what God has joined and leave friendship along the trail. You can end a love gracefully. And you should. Pick a leaf from M7. That guy could have declared himself a life president the Amin way. But he made it seem like a decision he is contemplating under duress!
What with the Parliament (and 10 of them are army MPs, officially armed) and several district councillors threatening to drag him to court for being selfish enough to return to his lucrative farming!
So, spread the blame to your parents, your emotional confusion, your getting sa-ved, your patriotism, etc to log off without crushing many bones. Let the ex-in-the-making know they are okay and lovable as people, that you like them as friends and will never forget their contribution to your life. (After all, it is usually true anyway). But due to public demand,....
Some people do so by pretending they are the aggrieved persons. “I still love you, but have failed to come to terms with the way you support the third term! Maybe I am stupid, but...â€. Use ambiguous, but diplomatic words like ‘failure to reconcile the events with your spiritual disposition’ - whatever that means.
It helps you to avoid giving a tangible reason, which can always be shot down, leaving you naked and exposed. If you say, “somehow, our chemistry has failed to connect...†how can the ‘bereaved’ argue that it connects? He can’t! But remember to end it with “I feel so bad because there is nothing wrong with you. Oh God: I will miss you!†This is just hot air, but formidable. You withdraw without injuring your ex’s self esteem.
And please, unless your ex deserves it (he is a bully, she is unfaithful) ending gracefully demands that you desist from blaming him/her. If it is you who wants to move on and your ex-to-be is dug in, don’t look for flimsy reasons from his camp. Just blame yourself and apologise. And try to minimise the damage on the part of ex.
Do not break the news on his/her special day like a birthday, Valentine’s Day, Christmas etc because these days will haunt them by reminding them of your ‘No’ vote. If you have got any expensive gifts from ex, offer to return them. Break up cleanly and completely, not partially. Don’t give ex any vain hope of resuscitating the affair. Looking back is not only cruel, but it can turn you into a pillar of salt.
Break the news in a public place where emotions are more likely to be contained. The pleading will be less and the confines of a bedroom may not be the safest place. Brethren, whether you are breaking up or being broken up with, the key word to remember is ‘grace’. This lover you want to crown your ex has made great contributions to your love life and even when your parliament denies this person unlimited terms, it is honourable to leave in peace when you are signing out.
Don’t say I did not warn you.
Ends