Can't have enough sex?You need help

 

The pretty girl has always been the joy of the family. Not only because she is the last born, but also because she had so much promise. “She does well in class, is respectful and always performs domestic chores very well,” says her mum. But there was a problem. AA has got an insatiable appetite for sex.

 

According to her parents, AA who is now in S.6 has been dismissed from several schools. In each case, she has been found having sex with boys. Her parents have sought assistance from different sources, but the problem has become persistent. Such is this 18-year-old’s obsession that, according to her mother, she never consecrates until she has had ‘some’. “She will not sit down to do her work; she will always be restless until her sexual desires have been met,” says the mother.

 

It has been such a heart-wrenching time for AA’s parents — so disturbing that her father once threatened to stop paying her school fees. Recently, however, she confided in her mother. “She told me that she cannot do without sex. How can I help my daughter?” she wonders.

 

Some skeptics may be quick to define AA’s condition as sex addiction. But Prof. Elna McIntosh, a sexual health expert, says often times the problem is not necessarily sexual. “Often there is something else wrong with the person.”  

 

“It could be a personality disorder, (borderline personality disorder (BPD).” — a prolonged disturbance of personality function in a person, often characterised by unusual levels of instability in mood and unstable interpersonal relationships as well as low self-esteem. 

 

Sometimes, she says, this hyper-sexuality could be a result of a bipolar condition — a brain disorder that causes unusual shifts in mood, energy and activity levels, which interferes with one’s ability to carry out day-to-day tasks.

 

In many cases, however, AA’s condition is categorised as compulsive sexual behaviour (CSB). “Like most behaviours, sex can be taken to its obsessive and compulsive extremes,” says McIntosh. She says sexual obsessions and compulsions are recurrent, distressing and interfere with daily functioning.

 

Different explanations have been given as causes of compulsive sexual behaviour. Some researchers have cited phychological problems, while others have suggested anxiety, mood and personality disorders. 

 

According to Dr. Assa Ahimbisibwe, an obstetric gynaecologist, what presents as sex addiction results from another; usually a non-sexual problem. 

 

“In many people it could be schizophrenia (a mental illness in which someone becomes unable to link thought, emotion and behaviour, leading to withdrawal from reality and personal relationships), or some such psychological disorder,” he says. Such excessive desire to do certain things is a sign of underlying mental problems.” 

 

In other cases, compulsive sexual behaviour can be caused by a neurological disorder such as epilepsy or Alzheimer's.  John Money in his work entitled “Clinical Concepts of Sexual/Erotic Health and Pathology…” attributes this condition to a complex interplay of biological, psychological and environmental factors in compulsive sexual behaviour.

 

“It may be caused by irregular chemical functions in the brain, which produce repetitious nature of the self-defeating behaviour. In this model, compulsive sexual behaviour is driven by anxiety where certain sexual behaviours provide temporary relief of the anxiety, but is followed by further anxiety and distress, creating a self-perpetuating cycle.” 

While there are many types of compulsive sexual behaviour, they can be divided into two main types; paraphilic and non-paraphilic. 

 

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) of the American Psychiatric Association has classified some of paraphilic compulsive sexual behaviour to include; pedophilia (sexual attraction to children) and exhibitionism (behaviour meant to make people notice you or admire you). Others are voyeurism (deriving sexual pleasure and gratification from looking at the naked bodies or people having sex) and transvestic fetishism (sexual excitement from wearing the clothing of the opposite sex), among others.

 

Nonparaphilic compulsive sexual behaviour involves conventional sexual behaviours which when taken to an extreme are recurrent, distressing and interfere in daily functioning. Examples include distress by the affected individual about a pattern of repeated sexual relationships involving a succession of lovers, usually experienced by the individual only as things to be used. 

 

Other forms of nonparaphilic CSB include; compulsive fixation on an unattainable partner, compulsive masturbation, compulsive love relationships and compulsive sexuality in a relationship.

 

There is always a danger of misunderstanding an individual’s condition. This, according to McIntosh, makes treatment for those suffering from this condition complicated. To find the proper treatment for such condition, one has to look at the patient holistically,” she says, “to observe what else is going on with her.”