Mum abandoned us when dad married a second wife

Shadia Nakwanga 16 is an adolescent mother whose life took a sharp turn when her parents separated. 

She says her childhood was pleasant. She lived with her mother, father and younger brother in Jinja town where she attended Buyengo boarding primary school. 

“I was my father’s favourite child and everybody knew it. He doted on me and provided all I needed,” she says.

Nankwanga (second from left) with other teenage mothers.

Her mother is a businesswoman and her father is a retired police officer.

However, things changed during her primary seven vacation when she returned home from school and found a stepmother. 

She would later learn that her mother had left her matrimonial home with her brother when she found out that her husband had married a second wife. Both Nankwanga’s parents are Muslims.  

She was enraged. The couple fought for several days and the husband insisted on having more wives because the Koran permits him. When she left, the second wife moved in. 

“Mum also discovered that my stepmother had been staying with dad in Luweero district where he was working. She got annoyed,” she says.

Unfortunately, the couple’s separation would later affect Nankwanga. She says, her mother had been tough on her, which in a way protected her from being spoilt. 

“Dad pampered me a lot. He stopped my stepmother from correcting my wrong behaviour. He would accuse her of torturing me the reason she gave up on me,” she recollects. 

In 2021, Nankwanga got a boyfriend who was in senior three. She would later conceive. 

Her boyfriend wanted to marry her, but her father refused, saying he wanted to enrol her back in school.  

She opted for skilling under Heroes for Gender Transformative Action Program (Heroes 4GTA) under MIFUMI, a women’s rights organization that provides community-based support services for survivors of violence and abuse.  

Nankwanga was skilled in hairdressing and she plans to open her salon with her father’s help. 

She has not heard from her mother since then. 

“I have learnt from my mistakes and those of my parents. I will strive to be a good wife and mother when I get married,” she says.