One-way traffic: Why Kuluthum and Akram's marriage was short-lived

To seek love after being widowed remains one of life’s taboos.  For Dr Kuluthum Nabunya Muzata, torn and vulnerable from the death of her husband, Sheikh Nuhu Batte Muzaata, in 2020, she needed encouragement from friends and family to find love again.

According to Muslim beliefs, a widow needs to wait for a four-month and ten-day period after the death of her spouse before starting another relationship.

For Kulthum’s case, she fulfilled the task and was ready to mingle.

 Perhaps buoyed by lyrics from Rod Stewart’s No Holding On, with lyrics like “It is better to lose in love than to never be loved at all”, she fell hook, line and sinker for a South African-based “engineer”, Akram Gumisiriza. Their union was announced one year after Muzaata’s death.

At their November 2022 introduction, an invite-only affair, Kuluthum, a Ph.D. holder in education management, revealed that despite her aching sadness for her past, she longed for a future filled with happiness, love and children with another man. Akram fitted the bill; he flew in to Uganda to become her knight in shining armour.

Two years down the road, Dr Kuluthum has pulled the plug. She never knew that her tender and shy husband would betray her (she’s spent a chunk of her marital time rubbishing claims of his infidelity and liaisons with sex workers). With brutal honesty, she reveals the fallout.

In her message, Dr Kulthum addressed the public, including religious, cultural, and political leaders, along with friends, family, and well-wishers.  She expressed that the decision to end her marriage was a painful but necessary one.

“This is one of the hardest letters I’ve ever had to write. But I believe it’s time to speak from the heart and let go of what I’ve been holding in for a long while,” she says.
She recounted meeting Acram in 2021, marrying him in 2022 after the death of her husband Sheikh Muzaata, seeking emotional companionship during a difficult period.  However, from the start, she says she noticed the “red flags”.

“I started seeing red flags early in the relationship. Despite trying to work through our differences, the emotional gap between us only grew wider with time,” she said.

She feigned indifference whenever stories of her husband’s alleged affairs did the rounds.

He never did much to allay her fears.  All through the episodes, he showed less of an emotional attachment towards her and merely went through the motions, preening before the mirror and chiselling his beard.

Dr Kulthum acknowledged that although both parties had once shared love and connection, that bond had faded.  She described feeling unseen, unheard, and unsupported and suspected her partner may have felt the same.  Whenever they were within breathing distance, all she did was shake with nerves and apprehension, not melt into jelly.
 
 Here’s her full statement:

Assalamu Alaikum Waramatul lahi Wabarkatuh

Greetings to All my Muslim Brothers and Sisters, All religious leaders, Cultural Leaders, fellow Ugandans, friends and family, Business Community, Political leaders Ladies and Gentlemen.

This is one of the hardest letters I’ve ever had to write, but I believe it’s time to speak from the bottom of my heart and put into words what I’ve been carrying inside for a long while.

I met Mr. Acram Gumisiriza in 2021, and we got married officially and legally in 2022 since I was single and I had lost my dear husband “the Late Sheik Muzaata Nooh Batte”, so I needed a companion and that’s how I ended up marrying Mr. Gumisiriza, however things didn’t move the way I expected, I started seeing red flags from the very start.

After much reflection, deep soul-searching, and countless attempts to mend what’s been broken between us, I have come to the difficult decision to end our marriage. This is not something I do lightly, and it is not an impulsive act. It is the result of months—perhaps years—of feeling the distance between us grow despite every effort to bridge it.

We both know our relationship has changed. The love we once shared, the connection we used to nurture, now feels like something we’re only trying to hold together out of habit, history, or fear. I no longer feel seen, heard, or supported in the ways that matter most. And I imagine, if you’re honest with yourself, you’ve felt the same too.

This is not about blame. It’s about acknowledging that we are no longer good for each other in the way that a partnership should be. And while it breaks my heart to say goodbye to the life we once imagined together, I know that holding on any longer would only deepen the pain for both of us.

I want this process to be as respectful and cooperative as possible. I hope we can part ways with grace, preserving the dignity of what we had. If there are legal matters or shared responsibilities we need to work through, I am committed to handling them with fairness and maturity.

Please understand, this letter is not meant to hurt you—it’s meant to finally be honest with both of us. I wish you peace, healing, and happiness in whatever your future holds. And I hope, in time, we can both look back without resentment, knowing we had our reasons, our lessons, and our time.

As we navigate this divorce, I want to acknowledge the spiritual and religious weight this decision carries. Marriage was not only a personal commitment but also a sacred one, and ending it is not something I take lightly. I have prayed, reflected, and sought peace in my heart before coming to this conclusion. While this may not be the outcome we envisioned, I believe that even in endings, Allah offers guidance, mercy, and the opportunity for healing. I hope we can move forward with grace, forgiveness, and a shared respect for the spiritual foundation that brought us together in the first place.

I truly hope that in time, we can both find peace and happiness on our own separate paths. Though this chapter “Marriage” has ended, I will always value the moments we shared and the lessons we’ve learned. I wish you well in everything ahead.

I regret to inform all those that have wished our marriage well that the road has ended and with immediate effect, and regarding our divorce, Sheikh Abdul Rahaman Serunjoji and my family will handle the whole divorce process.

Thanks, and Regards
Dr. Hajjat Kulthum Nabunya Muzaata

Cc: Muslim Community
Cc: All Religious Leaders
Cc: All Cultural Leaders
Cc: All Political Leaders
Cc: All Ugandans
Cc: All Ugandans in Diaspora
Cc: Ugandan Business Community
Cc: Education Fraternity