Big Brother Naija – 5th week and no villain in sight

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With no evictions this weekend (unless Big Brother pulls a shocker), the Housemates are back to their boring best. Almost to the last man and woman, on Day One, they said they would be themselves, and we should expect fire. Five weeks in the house and, if this is what they really are, then this is the worst ever group of Housemates in a Big Brother House.

If this is a 10-episode season, then we are just about halfway, but there are no clear favourites among the Housemates. No one is doing anything much to make themselves ‘unmissable’, although the Nigerian public is trying its best to hype up the different housemates. It is five weeks, and if we are still trying to identify who is who, that is a bad sign.

If there is no one we really like, at least there should be someone we don’t like. That would make us stay watching and hoping something happens to them. But this lot is so anonymous that there is no real bad guy, either. I think the Big Brother audition book should be edited, and should state that ‘being yourself’ is grounds for disqualification.

It takes a serious attitude to be the ‘most-tattooed’ person in the House, and we had hopes in Ivatar. But she is playing it safe and is hardly seen or heard. Wouldn’t be surprised if she’s the next to be evicted.

One of the girls described Kuture as the ‘ugliest’ man in the house, and maybe he should have run with that. But all he did was do a ‘shakara’ thing and threaten all kinds of violence, and after being warned by Big Brother, he is now a real wall flower.

Most of the rest are largely anonymous, and one has to keep looking for the name tags to identify them, halfway through the season. Again, bad sign.

The only real surprise is Sultana, from the Nigerian north. Muslim women are bred to neither be seen nor heard. Although we don’t hear much from Sultana in the house (she doesn’t quarrel much, thank God), she is somehow making her presence felt and is slowly taking it over. Question is if she has enough time before the end of the show.

Mide is the pretty face of the House, and this week is the ‘snail’, which means she has to wear a ‘witch hat’ all the time. That has turned out to be not such a bad thing, because she looks stunning in that hat, and all eyes turn to her when she appears.

Otherwise, it is quarrel after quarrel after quarrel. Any small disagreement ends up in a quarrel. Not a fight, where emotions are involved and clear stands taken; this is more like bickering, and it is getting tiresome. Are all Nigerians like this? Quarrelling all the time? This is going to be a long 10 weeks. Please pass me my wine.