Six years together and she doesn't want to commit

Jun 15, 2017

I can’t get her to plan anything for the future, not even a holiday with me.

My girlfriend of six years can't commit. She doesn't want to be tied down. She lives in my house but only pays towards the services - gas, electricity etc. She pays nothing towards household items but does buy some of the food.

I can't get her to plan anything for the future, not even a holiday with me. She says she sometimes feels crushed by the domesticity and wants to spend more time with her friends. Sometimes she says she would like to go and live abroad.

I have never tried to stop her seeing friends. I have even suggested that she might like to go back and live in her own house. At this point she cries and says how much she loves me; how she would be a fool to give up a relationship in which someone cares for her as I have. In short, I can't get her to go.

She isn't fully into the relationship when she is here, but won't give me back my life. We don't have proper sex any more to make things worse.

I have suggested she leave for a week and see how she gets on, or come and visits on a weekend, but we keep falling back into this half life. I truly believe she loves me and feels love in return. I am running out of ideas.

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