Why is my wife trying so hard to be the man?

My wife and I have been married for two years. During one of the pre-marital counselling sessions, the counsellor mentioned that a man's greatest need is respect.

He explained this to us and how lack of respect would impact our relationship negatively. My wife said she understood and I was confident we would have a blissful marriage.

My wife is independent-minded and thus she usually makes decisions about the family, occasionally without consulting me.

On other occasions, we agree on something as a couple and she does the exact opposite.

Recently, she consulted me about a loan her sister wanted and I discouraged my wife from considering it because we are cash-strapped given that we are building our house.

My wife gave her sister the loan without my approval. This is not the first time she is doing the opposite of what we agree on. Every time she does this, I feel disrespected and I tell her as much. She just turns a deaf ear.

Does my wife really love me? How can I handle this behaviour?

Musiime