My child is too confident

Jun 09, 2009

MY daughter is in P2. She is overconfident and very fast with her class work. She likes challenging her teachers even when her answers are wrong. She doesn’t proofread her work. How best can the teacher help her?

Dear James,

My daughter is in P2. She is overconfident and very fast with her class work. She likes challenging her teachers even when her answers are wrong. She doesn’t proofread her work. How best can the teacher help her?
Carol

Dear Carol,

I must congratulate you on having a confident child. A child’s self-confidence is an indicator of high self-esteem. The child’s self-esteem is a reliable yardstick for gauging your level of success at parenting. Just like Nancy Van Pelt mentions in her book, Train Up A Child, the best gift you can give your child is not just love but helping her believe in herself.

A good education should groom children to be leaders, not followers. Children should be empowered to think critically and believe in themselves. In a classroom, a child’s ability to think differently should be celebrated, not condemned.

Many teachers are uncomfortable with children who challenge them because they view it as disrespect. Your daughter’s ability to defend what she believes in (even if it is wrong) is intellectually healthy. An ideal classroom is one where learners are not gagged but are allowed to explore issues and learn by discovery.

A challenge from a child is an invitation to a lively class debate that can expand children’s thinking horizon. A child who insists that one plus one equals three should be challenged to defend their answer. Children learn more from such debates.

Excess confidence results into complacence. A complacent attitude makes a child take things for granted, kills their determination, ambition and hard work. Failure to proofread her work might be an indicator that she believes her work is error-free. Your daughter should be helped to understand that complacence can lead to failure.

Failure to proof read her work might also be a sign of short attention span. You need to work on this problem with her teacher.

Did you know that TV decreases a child’s attention span and weakens their imagination? This is because the child becomes accustomed to quick, short bursts of information. Try to limit her TV consumption and supervise her more closely when she is doing her homework. It is possible your daughter might be a gifted learner who needs a unique approach.

The following are some of the tips you can discuss with the teacher to help her.
  • Resist the temptation of giving her advanced work to prove her wrong.

  • Avoid statements like: ‘See I told you she was not gifted, I gave her one tough assignment and she failed.’

  • Do not give her more work when she finishes early. Finishing early is a clear indication that the work was not well planned, hence not challenging enough. This approach might make her bored and she might hate the studies.


  • She should not be criticised for challenging the teacher. Instead, bounce the question back to her with questions like, ‘what do you think? Or ‘that sounds interesting, tell us more.’

    Your daughter is at a critical developmental stage. It is at this age that the foundation of verbal communication is laid. Your daughter is still a child and should be understood as such.

    jwagwau@newvision.co.ug

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