If your child is naughty...
Nov 06, 2009
IT is every parent’s dream to have well-behaved children, who bring them nothing but joy. However, usually this dream is just that, a dream!
BY MAUREEN NAKATUDDE
IT is every parent’s dream to have well-behaved children, who bring them nothing but joy. However, usually this dream is just that, a dream!
In reality children misbehave and they need to be disciplined. So, how does a parent do this? According to Eddie Kigozi, the director of Bright Future Primary School, Gayaza, before disciplining a child, a parent needs to show them unconditional love. He says: “Once a child knows you love them, you can handle their bad behaviour. When you talk to the child and show that you trust them, they might change.â€
Masitula Namugenyi, a counsellor in Kampala, says a naughty child can be handled by promising them a reward when they behave well. Such rewards can include more play time with a favourite toy or taking them somewhere special, like an amusement park.
Namugenyi adds that should the child fail to do what was asked, you do not give them any rewards, but you also take away some of their privileges.
At times, children learn bad behaviour from their peers. Namugenyi advises that you do not to let your child spend time with such children. Instead, identify children with good bahviour and encourage your child to befriend them.
Perhaps, your child is idle and this allows them time to behave badly. The best way you can change this behaviour is by keeping them busy. Assign them tasks such that there is no room for idleness.
If peaceful means do not stop your child from behaving badly, then you need to administer the cane. However, cane with caution, do not over do it. You also need to explain to your child why you are caning them. You can tell them: “I’m beating you because we agreed that you would not do this, but you have done it. So these canes will remind you next time.†Here, the child will understand that he or she was at fault and hence will not do it again. If you just beat the child without any explanation, they will get angry and become bitter. As a result, they may refuse to change their bad behaviour.
When all is said and done, and the child does not seem to listen, Namugenyi advises you to pray for the child to change.
When a child changes their behaviour, show them that you have noticed. Kigozi advises: “Praise the child and if possible, give them a reward.†If you do not do this, they will continue misbehaving. Their reasoning will be, what is the point of doing right when no one notices?
No matter what your child has done, keep affirming them. Show them that you love them, despite their bad behaviour. Use positive phrases like: “this is not the way my Jane behaves. I know it is not her because Jane always behaves well.†On the other hand, if you insist on calling them obstinate, do not be surprised when they turn out to be what you call them.
IT is every parent’s dream to have well-behaved children, who bring them nothing but joy. However, usually this dream is just that, a dream!
In reality children misbehave and they need to be disciplined. So, how does a parent do this? According to Eddie Kigozi, the director of Bright Future Primary School, Gayaza, before disciplining a child, a parent needs to show them unconditional love. He says: “Once a child knows you love them, you can handle their bad behaviour. When you talk to the child and show that you trust them, they might change.â€
Masitula Namugenyi, a counsellor in Kampala, says a naughty child can be handled by promising them a reward when they behave well. Such rewards can include more play time with a favourite toy or taking them somewhere special, like an amusement park.
Namugenyi adds that should the child fail to do what was asked, you do not give them any rewards, but you also take away some of their privileges.
At times, children learn bad behaviour from their peers. Namugenyi advises that you do not to let your child spend time with such children. Instead, identify children with good bahviour and encourage your child to befriend them.
Perhaps, your child is idle and this allows them time to behave badly. The best way you can change this behaviour is by keeping them busy. Assign them tasks such that there is no room for idleness.
If peaceful means do not stop your child from behaving badly, then you need to administer the cane. However, cane with caution, do not over do it. You also need to explain to your child why you are caning them. You can tell them: “I’m beating you because we agreed that you would not do this, but you have done it. So these canes will remind you next time.†Here, the child will understand that he or she was at fault and hence will not do it again. If you just beat the child without any explanation, they will get angry and become bitter. As a result, they may refuse to change their bad behaviour.
When all is said and done, and the child does not seem to listen, Namugenyi advises you to pray for the child to change.
When a child changes their behaviour, show them that you have noticed. Kigozi advises: “Praise the child and if possible, give them a reward.†If you do not do this, they will continue misbehaving. Their reasoning will be, what is the point of doing right when no one notices?
No matter what your child has done, keep affirming them. Show them that you love them, despite their bad behaviour. Use positive phrases like: “this is not the way my Jane behaves. I know it is not her because Jane always behaves well.†On the other hand, if you insist on calling them obstinate, do not be surprised when they turn out to be what you call them.