Comfort zone
Jul 11, 2008
<b>I ‘release’ too quickly during sex, now my girlfriend wants to leave me</b><br><br>Dear Total man, <br>I am 26, in love with a 20 year old girl. My problem is that I cannot engage in sex for long. Three to five minutes make me release and tire out. One day she told me that I always leave h
I ‘release’ too quickly during sex, now my girlfriend wants to leave me
Dear Total man,
I am 26, in love with a 20 year old girl. My problem is that I cannot engage in sex for long. Three to five minutes make me release and tire out. One day she told me that I always leave her wanting more and that it angers her but she keeps quiet. I try my best to last longer but ‘wapi’. She even told her best friend about this situation, and said she had started thinking of letting me go. I don’t want to lose her. She means a lot to me. Some friends tell me that coming too soon is a sign of immaturity. But at 26!
So total man, help me before I lose her.
- Bravo
Dear Bravo,
Your condition is known as premature ejaculation. It is common and not a sign of immaturity.
However, it halts your partner’s sexual fulfilment and affects your self-esteem.
It may be caused by being over excited, on tension or worried that you are going to come fast or fail to control it. Generally, men ejaculate too quickly especially on the first round but they get another erection after a short rest. This should be the case at your age.
But your anxiety and worry that you have let her down interfere with your arousal, and you fail to get another erection soon after. It is good you have started talking about it with your girlfriend. Ask her to desist from threatening to leave you or telling others about it.
Time will heal you. In the meantime, use a condom, which can decrease sensitivity and delay ejaculation. Circumcision can also work, but remember, it is irreversible.
In the meantime, prolong your romance and let your girlfriend rise her ecstasy to peak levels before you start penetration. She will be fulfiled without putting you on tension to make it longer.
Once you achieve this, you can concentrate on practicing how to delay ejaculation. Do this by slowing your thrusts.
You can also squeeze the head of the penis when you are about to come. Your doctor can also counsel you or prescribe a drug which can help prolong intercourse.
Counselling helps deal with anxiety in sexual conditions.
Above all, remember that unprotected sex can expose you to HIV.
Use protection and know that life is more important than satisfying a partner sexually.
Dr Love
Dear Total man,
I am 26, in love with a 20 year old girl. My problem is that I cannot engage in sex for long. Three to five minutes make me release and tire out. One day she told me that I always leave her wanting more and that it angers her but she keeps quiet. I try my best to last longer but ‘wapi’. She even told her best friend about this situation, and said she had started thinking of letting me go. I don’t want to lose her. She means a lot to me. Some friends tell me that coming too soon is a sign of immaturity. But at 26!
So total man, help me before I lose her.
- Bravo
Dear Bravo,
Your condition is known as premature ejaculation. It is common and not a sign of immaturity.
However, it halts your partner’s sexual fulfilment and affects your self-esteem.
It may be caused by being over excited, on tension or worried that you are going to come fast or fail to control it. Generally, men ejaculate too quickly especially on the first round but they get another erection after a short rest. This should be the case at your age.
But your anxiety and worry that you have let her down interfere with your arousal, and you fail to get another erection soon after. It is good you have started talking about it with your girlfriend. Ask her to desist from threatening to leave you or telling others about it.
Time will heal you. In the meantime, use a condom, which can decrease sensitivity and delay ejaculation. Circumcision can also work, but remember, it is irreversible.
In the meantime, prolong your romance and let your girlfriend rise her ecstasy to peak levels before you start penetration. She will be fulfiled without putting you on tension to make it longer.
Once you achieve this, you can concentrate on practicing how to delay ejaculation. Do this by slowing your thrusts.
You can also squeeze the head of the penis when you are about to come. Your doctor can also counsel you or prescribe a drug which can help prolong intercourse.
Counselling helps deal with anxiety in sexual conditions.
Above all, remember that unprotected sex can expose you to HIV.
Use protection and know that life is more important than satisfying a partner sexually.
Dr Love