I am in trouble for rejecting marriage
Jan 18, 2006
Navpreet Kaur, a 22-year-old Indian, is not a happy girl. Her woes are conspicuous on her innocent face. She has been confined in her parents’ house since last year. She only gets out to go to the temple strictly under guard.
By Alice Emasu and Elvis Basudde
Navpreet Kaur, a 22-year-old Indian, is not a happy girl. Her woes are conspicuous on her innocent face. She has been confined in her parents’ house since last year. She only gets out to go to the temple strictly under guard.
Her parents, Mr and Mrs Gurbax Sigh, residents of Old Kampala, have taken her out of school prematurely. They have also subjected her to untold physical and psychological torture. Reason? She has twice refused to marry the men of her parents’ choice.
Navpreet was brought to Uganda when she was barely five years old. While in S.3 she attempted to commit suicide by taking an overdose of medicine. Two weeks ago, she threatened to run into a moving vehicle and die because her parents had frustrated her efforts to work and save money to go back to school.
Alice Kiwanuka, a nurse who has known Navpreet for four years and used to treat her free of charge, had secured her a casual job in town.
She was saved by Kiwanuka’s quick intervention when she took the case to FIDA after her daughter Rachel Nakimera, a close friend of Navpreet, told her about her plight.
“I intervened because I feared that if the girl committed suicide or disappeared from their home, her parents would hold me responsible yet I was just helping out to get the girl a job because of her desperate situation,†says Kiwanuka who owns a clinic in Old Kampala.
She says she did not report the girl’s threats to her parents after her earlier attempts to meet them failed. She had earlier on tried in vain to seek audience with the girl’s mother when she got for her the job.
“This policeman is lying. I told him twice in his office that I hated returning to my father’s home for fear of my life. It is surprising to see the same man changing the story and accusing those who helped me report my case to the police,†said Navpreet while pointing at the empty seat where OC, Dennis Olaa, Family Protection Unit, Old Kampala Police Station, was seated.
Olaa who had accompanied Navpreet and her father to the New Vision offices on Friday, January 13, 2006, was defending her father, saying it is the neighbours and FIDA officers that were inciting the girl against her parents.
“The policeman has become friendly to my father whom he got to know through me. Why do you think he has accompanied him? He might have given him money,†said Navpreet, looking terrified.
The innocent looking, but strong-willed Navpreet surprised her interviewers when she revealed that she doubted if the family she was staying with was her true family.
She said her parents stopped her from going to school when she was in S.5 just to concentrate on domestic work. Even when she chanced on a juicy job where she hoped to raise money and return to school, her parents rejected the idea and confined her to the house.
Displaying scars on her fragile body, Navpreet said her parents often beat her anywhere with anything within their reach at any time. She said even her only brother, who also accompanied her during the interview, batters her whenever she makes a ‘mistake’. Torture and harassment are part of her life.
The family has a medical insurance card at BAI Hospital in Kampala, but Navpreet says she has never been to the hospital even when she falls sick. Last year she fell so sick and she secretly went to Kiwanuka’s clinic where she got free treatment.
“One time she developed maggots in her stomach and that sucked almost 5ml of her blood. She had become pale, had frequent fever and was penniless,†Kiwanuka said.
Navpreet’s closest friend, who preferred anonymity, but of Indian origin, was disgusted by the way her friend was mistreated by her parents. She says they met at Citizen Secondary School during their O-level education.
She described Navpreet as a sociable, hardworking and intelligent girl, who always confided in her whenever she was stopped from going to school or battered.
Navpreet often asked her friend whether the woman she was staying with was her real mother.
She said Navpreet told her that her parents had got her two men, one an Indian living in India and another, a Pakistani, resident in Uganda.
She said last year her parents flew her to India to meet the man, but they never came to a compromise.
About the proposed forced marriage, she said it is the Indian culture for parents to shop for partners for their daughters and marry them off. But most families are today liberated and the girls are introducing men of their choice to their parents with much ease.
Juliet Hatanga, the legal officer handling the case at FIDA, said with the help of Kiwanuka and the Police, she was able to reach Navpreet’s parents’ home with the intention of reconciling them. But the girl’s parents put up resistance on learning that the case was at FIDA and the Police.
Hatanga said the father told her categorically that their culture is not subject to debate. The girl has to accept the marriage without necessarily seeing her suitor until the wedding day.
He said he was under pressure from his wife to raise US$20,000 so that the girl is taken back to India to get married.
Hatanga said Navpreet’s father complained that his wife feared that if the girl does not get married, her community would blame her for failing to bring up the girl well.
“But what is interesting is that Navpreet’s 26-year-old sister is not married and is employed,†Hatanga asserts.
Hatanga also showed New Vision text messages sent on her phone by Navpreet. They read, “Please do not tell the chairman of the Indian community about our family scandals because the Indian community behave the same way. They will blame me for reporting the case to you.â€
But Gurbax Sigh, the girl’s father, who owns a construction company, M.B Construction INILT ltd denied the allegations rubbishing them as baseless and malicious intended to blemish his reputation and spoil his business.
The visibly angry Gurbax Sigh said he withdrew the girl from school because she was a slow learner and couldnot manage stress in higher school.
However, he says, he was contemplating taking the girl back to school after she has had a period of resting.
Navpreet Kaur, a 22-year-old Indian, is not a happy girl. Her woes are conspicuous on her innocent face. She has been confined in her parents’ house since last year. She only gets out to go to the temple strictly under guard.
Her parents, Mr and Mrs Gurbax Sigh, residents of Old Kampala, have taken her out of school prematurely. They have also subjected her to untold physical and psychological torture. Reason? She has twice refused to marry the men of her parents’ choice.
Navpreet was brought to Uganda when she was barely five years old. While in S.3 she attempted to commit suicide by taking an overdose of medicine. Two weeks ago, she threatened to run into a moving vehicle and die because her parents had frustrated her efforts to work and save money to go back to school.
Alice Kiwanuka, a nurse who has known Navpreet for four years and used to treat her free of charge, had secured her a casual job in town.
She was saved by Kiwanuka’s quick intervention when she took the case to FIDA after her daughter Rachel Nakimera, a close friend of Navpreet, told her about her plight.
“I intervened because I feared that if the girl committed suicide or disappeared from their home, her parents would hold me responsible yet I was just helping out to get the girl a job because of her desperate situation,†says Kiwanuka who owns a clinic in Old Kampala.
She says she did not report the girl’s threats to her parents after her earlier attempts to meet them failed. She had earlier on tried in vain to seek audience with the girl’s mother when she got for her the job.
“This policeman is lying. I told him twice in his office that I hated returning to my father’s home for fear of my life. It is surprising to see the same man changing the story and accusing those who helped me report my case to the police,†said Navpreet while pointing at the empty seat where OC, Dennis Olaa, Family Protection Unit, Old Kampala Police Station, was seated.
Olaa who had accompanied Navpreet and her father to the New Vision offices on Friday, January 13, 2006, was defending her father, saying it is the neighbours and FIDA officers that were inciting the girl against her parents.
“The policeman has become friendly to my father whom he got to know through me. Why do you think he has accompanied him? He might have given him money,†said Navpreet, looking terrified.
The innocent looking, but strong-willed Navpreet surprised her interviewers when she revealed that she doubted if the family she was staying with was her true family.
She said her parents stopped her from going to school when she was in S.5 just to concentrate on domestic work. Even when she chanced on a juicy job where she hoped to raise money and return to school, her parents rejected the idea and confined her to the house.
Displaying scars on her fragile body, Navpreet said her parents often beat her anywhere with anything within their reach at any time. She said even her only brother, who also accompanied her during the interview, batters her whenever she makes a ‘mistake’. Torture and harassment are part of her life.
The family has a medical insurance card at BAI Hospital in Kampala, but Navpreet says she has never been to the hospital even when she falls sick. Last year she fell so sick and she secretly went to Kiwanuka’s clinic where she got free treatment.
“One time she developed maggots in her stomach and that sucked almost 5ml of her blood. She had become pale, had frequent fever and was penniless,†Kiwanuka said.
Navpreet’s closest friend, who preferred anonymity, but of Indian origin, was disgusted by the way her friend was mistreated by her parents. She says they met at Citizen Secondary School during their O-level education.
She described Navpreet as a sociable, hardworking and intelligent girl, who always confided in her whenever she was stopped from going to school or battered.
Navpreet often asked her friend whether the woman she was staying with was her real mother.
She said Navpreet told her that her parents had got her two men, one an Indian living in India and another, a Pakistani, resident in Uganda.
She said last year her parents flew her to India to meet the man, but they never came to a compromise.
About the proposed forced marriage, she said it is the Indian culture for parents to shop for partners for their daughters and marry them off. But most families are today liberated and the girls are introducing men of their choice to their parents with much ease.
Juliet Hatanga, the legal officer handling the case at FIDA, said with the help of Kiwanuka and the Police, she was able to reach Navpreet’s parents’ home with the intention of reconciling them. But the girl’s parents put up resistance on learning that the case was at FIDA and the Police.
Hatanga said the father told her categorically that their culture is not subject to debate. The girl has to accept the marriage without necessarily seeing her suitor until the wedding day.
He said he was under pressure from his wife to raise US$20,000 so that the girl is taken back to India to get married.
Hatanga said Navpreet’s father complained that his wife feared that if the girl does not get married, her community would blame her for failing to bring up the girl well.
“But what is interesting is that Navpreet’s 26-year-old sister is not married and is employed,†Hatanga asserts.
Hatanga also showed New Vision text messages sent on her phone by Navpreet. They read, “Please do not tell the chairman of the Indian community about our family scandals because the Indian community behave the same way. They will blame me for reporting the case to you.â€
But Gurbax Sigh, the girl’s father, who owns a construction company, M.B Construction INILT ltd denied the allegations rubbishing them as baseless and malicious intended to blemish his reputation and spoil his business.
The visibly angry Gurbax Sigh said he withdrew the girl from school because she was a slow learner and couldnot manage stress in higher school.
However, he says, he was contemplating taking the girl back to school after she has had a period of resting.