Give your child a break!

Apr 08, 2002

He sighed loudly. “I tried. God knows I tried.” This what Peter was intimating to his friend regarding his PLE achievements.

By Margaret LubegaHe sighed loudly. “I tried. God knows I tried.” This what Peter was intimating to his friend regarding his PLE achievements. He had failed to make it to one of the traditional schools that his father attended. He is now attending one of the ‘other’ schools for his ‘O’ level. “My dad keeps saying weird things about me and to me. Just because I did not join his former school,” Peter laments.The truth has to remain. Not all children will get aggregate 4. Children getting aggregate 10 can do wonders at ‘O’ level. Many parents make a mistake by conveying the idea to their children that they are accepted only when they succeed. Accepting what your child has achieved provides healthy ground for further growth, self-confidence and room for improvement. Belittling your children causes them to lose confidence. Children who do not feel accepted by parents become vulnerable to destructive group pressure. if children feel loved and valued, they are empowered to cope with life’s challenges. The way children are accepted in the early years determines to a great extent the esteem they have of themselves and others when they reach adulthood. Here are some tips on how to accept your child.- Avoid constant criticism. It creates feelings of failure, rejection and inadequacy. - Excessive comparisons of your children with others conveys a lack of acceptance. No two children are alike and to compare one with another is a great injustice. - Do not expect your children to achieve your unfulfilled dreams. Let them be what they want. - Avoid over protection. It kills the spirit of adventure and plants a spirit of fear. - Do not expect too much from your children. Accept their weaknesses. - Recognise each child as unique. - For heaven’s sake listen to the children. The writer is a lecturer at Kyambogo.

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