How to avoid running late

Apr 26, 2016

This article is for people who are chronically late. It addresses the deeper psychological aspects of being late as a perpetual habit.

Everybody is late for something at one time or another. Cars break down or become stuck in traffic, oversleeping happens unexpectedly, a child throws up and needs medical attention or you get held up collecting your dry cleaning. Yet, for some people running late isn't an occasional occurrence precipitated by an event mostly or completely out of their control.

This article is for people who are chronically late. It addresses the deeper psychological aspects of being late as a perpetual habit.

Accept that being late is rarely appropriate. While there are some cultures where lateness is considered the norm and even a desirable trait, if you're living in a culture that values timeliness and attention to the clock, then you're going to have to give punctuality some credence, at least in those parts of your life where being late can impact your chances of leading a more fulfilling and successfully interactive life.
Make plans to dispel the anxiety. If the reason behind your being late is due to anxiety about cost, performance, ability to get to a place, or other reasons, planning ahead can help remove your anxiety and get you somewhere on time.

Stop using being late as a form of power over others. If this is the reason for your being late, it's time to stop before you have few friends and trusted colleagues. In this instance, everyone can see what you're doing but it's most likely that they're tolerating the lateness out of need to defer for one reason or another, not out of respect or willingness.

Find your source of self-esteem within. If you feel a need to use lateness as a form of testing your loved ones' loyalty and determination to stick with you, there is something missing inside, namely self-love. Remind yourself that you don't need others to constantly prove they care about you by giving up their time waiting around for you.

Relax. If being late is your idea of an expression of being important, busy and the linchpin of the operations, then you're risking an early grave brought about by stress! The person who feels that they just have to make a fuss all the while they're running behind schedule and complaining about not being able to get everything done on time and yet behaving indispensable despite the tardiness, turns what could have been a potentially smooth, calm and timely activity into a frenetic, crazily paced and often haphazard one that brings about its own lateness.

Be realistically optimistic. Everyone loves optimism but even this good vibe can go too far when it enters the realm of magical thinking and hopefulness at the expense of realistic outcomes. As with the anxious person, an overly optimistic assessment of your ability to get from A to B in peak hour traffic or to finalize a deadline without resources comes about as a result of a lack of planning


Organize your life for better flow and fit. If you're the sort of person who is apt to cram too many appointments into the day or who finds it hard to say no, this behavior can be a source of lateness simply because you're juggling too much and the balls keep dropping despite your best intentions.

Honor time. By respecting the value of your time, you will start to set limitations of doing things that chew up your time, such as reading emails instead of going to bed on time, etc. Your time is valuable and you owe it to yourself to learn to deal in it with greater precision so that you make the most of your time rather than simply allowing it to flow on endlessly without plans, limits or even noticing.

Use positive self-talk to talk yourself out of believing that you're "an always late person". Every time someone suggests that "you'd be late for your own funeral", this summation of your personality risks becoming an internal badge of honor.

See being punctual as a matter of good etiquette. Being late is inconsiderate, while being on time is an obvious expression of respect toward others. You lack the power to restore time other people have lost waiting for you, so it's disrespectful to assume you have the right to take it from them without good cause.

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});