Mothering Bebe Cool

Jul 29, 2005

<b>QUESTION: Motherhood and grandparenting: Which do you enjoy most?<br>ANSWER:</b> Oh, motherhood because you become a woman. You change from girlhood to being called mother. I loved children so much and I thank God my love wasn’t wasted because all my 10 children are what I wanted them to be.

QUESTION: Motherhood and grandparenting: Which do you enjoy most?
ANSWER:
Oh, motherhood because you become a woman. You change from girlhood to being called mother. I loved children so much and I thank God my love wasn’t wasted because all my 10 children are what I wanted them to be.

You don’t enjoy being grandmother?
I enjoy it very much. You can only be a grandmother after growing old, something everyone doesn’t get to enjoy. My grandchildren say that they have a smart grandmother. They are very humble and they love me very much. In fact, they call me mummy because I brought some of them up.

How often do you chat with your children?
Quiet often. I believe that parents have to talk to their children - I have ten children but God helped in that I know how to talk with each of them. As a parent, you have to learn every child’s character and know that so and so is like this.
I know what each of 10 my children is capable of doing and what he/she can’t do. This is because we talk, even when they do something wrong. I don’t believe in caning because punishments are meant to shape not to break children.

You never caned any of those ten children?
I did, but it was on very rare occasions. They beat them at schools they are used to canes: why should you beat them when they come home? You do something different.
I remember spending three days without talking to one of my sons. He knew that mummy was angry with him and didn’t love him anymore. He wrote an apology letter which he took to his headmaster and begged him to bring it to me on his behalf.

Do you have a favourite child?
Some people say that parents love their last borns more than the other children but I balance my love right from the first to the tenth child. I love them the same way because I breast-fed them myself without letting a maid bring them up.
I was a working woman but I used to check on them everyday. I used to tuck them in bed, no matter how tired I was.

Was their father that caring?
They have different fathers but I stayed with them (children) all my life. I call myself a self-mother. I started motherhood when I was in S.3 at Lubiri Secondary School. After that, I thank God, He gave me nine more children

Wasn’t single parenting a big challenge?
Of course it was. The biggest challenge was that I couldn’t satisfy all their needs but, somehow, you get the wisdom to play with what you have and meet the challenge. Plus it wasn’t easy to ask their fathers for school fees but I thank God that they eventually gave me the money.

Did you advise Bebe Cool when he started singing?
“As long as you don’t take njaga (marijuana)”, I advised him, and now when people say that he does, I feel very strong because he promised me that he wouldn’t touch it.
I have no reason to doubt him because I’ve never seen him taking it or smelt it on his breath. I also told him to focus on what he had chosen to do and I’m glad he has.

Do you like his hairstyle?
At first I didn’t. It’s not easy for a parent to accept such hair; fellow parents used to ask me “Why have you let the child plait such hair?” But he told me one thing, ‘Mummy, this is my trademark. It’s the only way people will know me.’ So I accepted it even when people called him murasi. The good thing is that he used to look after it and keep it clean. Now I think his hair is not as important as his conduct.

How do you feel about Bebe Cool’s music?

I love it. I don’t move every time I go to his show. I remember his very first show at sabrina’s pub — I looked at him singing and wondered “Is this really my child?” I’m a musician myself so I feel very proud of him especially when people ask me, ‘Are you Bebe Cool’s mother?’ Then I think, Bebe Cool is this important?

Do you tailor his costumes?
Sometimes. I’ve made some of those short and stylish costumes his girls wear on his shows. I’m a tailor and if I can support him by making costumes for him and his dancers, why not? I support him as much as I can because he is my child and that is his job. You can have many children - one composes songs when another is just sitting at home. Should I stop the musician from singing because I’m a Christian when I have no job to give him?

What’s your favourite song?
Ha!! You know I head the women ministry in my church (Kanyanya) so I enjoyed his song Talimba Yesu very much.
Sambagala was also good because it reminds me of my youthful days when we also wore minis (short skirts) and bell trousers and went to nightclubs. It really touched me.

Were you worried when he was stabbed?
Do you know what I did when they told me? I sat down and continued with whatever I was doing. I went much later because I knew that he’d be fine. That incident was one of their kiddish things so I know they will all (Bebe Cool, Chameleone and Bobi Wine) grow up when they realise that they are very important people in Uganda.

Do you like Zuena?
Very much. I’m a very good mother in law because Zuena cares about my son. They are a young couple but she knows that Bebe Cool is her husband. She really cares about him because I’ve never heard that they have a marital problem. Besides she saves me from doing many things - like I don’t have to worry about what he’ll eat anymore.

Miss Samalie Ssepuya talked to Elizabeth Namazzi

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