By Cathy Bagaya
As far as I remember, for a young woman growing up in this conservative society, it is wrong to accept a jama’s advances in the blink of an eye.
The moment there was a sign that little hills were starting to grow on one’s chest, there and then mothers, aunts and elder sisters got into full alert mode and started warning us about the way we carried ourselves around men.
Behind the playing hard to get game is the idea that a man would never want a woman that quickly gave in to his advances; and truth be told being chased by the same jama is quite interesting, especially if you like him, but can get annoying if you do not.
But not every man finds this game interesting, some believe that if there is chemistry between two people then there should be an immediate reaction.
The ‘reactions’ are there to the eye that wants to see them: we get shy, nervous and tend to giggle over nothing when the guys we like are around us. But we cannot admit to that fact in a day, we need to be sure that you are not playing with our feelings.
The irony about all this, though, is that it is just a gamble. Sometimes we play hard to get and lose out on that one guy because he does not have the patience to play the game; other times we are lucky that he is patient, but then there is that case where the guys play hard to get after they have us in their palms!
This is where it gets confusing and we ask ourselves whether it is worth pretending not to like that person making moves on us.
It is also true that the times have changed and not many girls see the need to play the game, if she likes you there is no need to put you through the hustle. They believe there is no need to act up since both parties are adults and know what they want.
This has had its advantages for the guys, but it has created a problem for some of us who enjoy being hunted. I know it takes guts to approach a girl that you like, and we usually know what you are after anyway. But personally I always want to hear one’s approach.
It is like an exam, once you get over the nerves everything just follows. For example, one time some jama walks up to me and drops this line: “If you buy me a beer, I will take you to lunch tomorrow”. Clever, right? But some of you chicks out there are taking this away from my life. I just enjoy being chased, so stop making it so easy.
Playing hard to get is not always fun I will admit to that, but I know one thing for sure it may just save you the pain. When you play the game, you give yourself time to re-evaluate what you are feeling, gain respect, get to find out more about the other party. And if it does not work out, there will be no point where you beat yourself up for not taking it slow”.
So ladies let the games begin. #Team play hard to get.
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