Life Style
Should single mothers live with their parents?
Publish Date: Mar 02, 2014
Should single mothers live with their parents?
Parents are willing to support their children even when they are big enough to start their independent families
  • mail
  • img
newvision

By Vicky Wandawa

Four years ago, while Aggie was ready to settle down because she had a son, her boyfriend was not. He partied hard. So, she stayed at her parents’ home.

Her parents welcomed her, though she felt it was not right for her to live home at her age, with a baby. She suggested a kwanjula but he claimed he did not have money. She says of her situation: “I am 28, a mother of one and boldly living home with my parents. Besides, my job offers poor pay.”

Expert view
Ann Asiimwe, a counsellor with Care Counselling Services in Bukoto, blames the economic crisis for the rising number of single mothers who have graduated from university and perhaps even have jobs, living with their parents.

“Their jobs may not be paying enough to sustain a life on their own with the baby,” says Asiimwe.

But she also blames parents who spoil their children and encourage them to stay home even if they have jobs sufficient enough to sustain them on their own.

Winfred Kabanda of Tugunjuke counseling services, also known as Senga Smart, blames the situation on the failure to take girls through pre-marital counselling.

She says numerous couples enter marriage with insufficient counselling and when the heat builds up, the young mothers run home to their parents.

Kabanda also blames the men. “They are dishonest and yet the girls rush into getting intimate with them.

By the time they realise the men are unserious, they are pregnant and if they cannot take care of the baby themselves, they end up going back home.”

Dos and don'ts of living with parents

“Be on your best behavior,” Asiimwe advises. “Always be there for your baby and clean up after it. What’s more, one is bound to get questioning looks from relatives, or even mean statements.”

However, Asiimwe advises, “Desist from fighting back or responding in the negative, so as to keep the peace.”


Young mothers may feel like failures and worry about the future, but Asiimwe says it is better to accept the situation as it is and not blame anyone, as well as forgive oneself. That, she says, gives one a clear mind to ably plan exactly how and when to leave their parents’ house.

Would you live with your parents?


Karen Mark, interior designer

Not if I was emotionally and financially stable. As a mother, I would need to be independent of my parents.

Dora Omunyidde, cashier
I would, if my family could accommodate me.

Hope Tino, monitoring and evaluation officer
I would prefer living on my own.

Sara Madunduli, social worker
At the start, I would prefer to live with my parents as I learn how to take care of the baby, but after my maternity leave, I would go live alone and make it on my own, even without the baby’s father.

 

The statements, comments, or opinions expressed through the use of New Vision Online are those of their respective authors, who are solely responsible for them, and do not necessarily represent the views held by the staff and management of New Vision Online.

New Vision Online reserves the right to moderate, publish or delete a post without warning or consultation with the author.Find out why we moderate comments. For any questions please contact digital@newvision.co.ug

  • mail
  • img
blog comments powered by Disqus
Also In This Section
Lupita Nyong
Oscar-winning actress Lupita Nyong'o has returned home to Kenya to spearhead a new campaign to stop the record slaughter of elephants for their valuable ivory....
Lunch hour fellowship to transform Kampala
The love of God saw the best in a prostitute everyone despised and wanted dead....
‘Earn a living from medicinal herbs farming’
When Twaha Kakooza sees medicinal herbs in a garden, he sees money. This is why he has made a nursery bed for every type of herbs of he has....
Nabagereka advises Ugandans to revive reading culture
Her Royal Highness the Nabagereka of Buganda, Sylvia Nagginda, has encouraged Ugandans to discover the treasure in reading books all the time in order to learn new things....
Bride & Groom Expo ends with excitement, triumph, pomp
Uganda''s largest wedding exhibition ended on Sunday evening with a grand finale that saw exhibitors who tirelessly who put up a great show rewarded for their efforts...
Prostitution cycle must be broken – activists
Brenda Atiku is a 16-year old girl. She had a wish to complete her studies and become a responsible citizen, but her journey to education was cut short when she lost both her parents...
With Eddie Kenzo’s win at the BET awards, is Ugandan music being recognized worldwide?
Yes
No
Can't Say
follow us
subscribe to our news letter