• No_Ads
Life Style
When cheating is healthy for a relationshipPublish Date: Dec 16, 2013
When cheating is healthy for a relationship
  • mail
  • img
Women, especially, try to fix the situation

By Angella Kateemu

I do not condone cheating. I think it is the most selfish, insensitive thing any person should have to endure. But the reality is, people do cheat; men and women alike. Not all people, of course.

The other reality is that people don’t cheat out of the blue. But can cheating be healthy for a relationship? The scenario we are working with here is that cheating has taken place or is taking place.

There are two ways to look at it: when you catch a cheating partner you will either try to work it out or you will walk away from the sadistic relationship that would probably drive you to suicide.

If you haven’t cheated, throw a big rock… ensure you don’t cheat.

To start off, last year’s Uganda Bureau of Statistics findings estimated 19% of women cheat, compared to 23% of men. These are married people, so who knows how desolate the situation is with other relationships?

Women are less likely to get caught and men, even if they are caught have a tendency to apologise, only to go back. I only point this out to note that there are many unfaithful people among us and many will never get caught (or so they believe).

Cheating is cheating

Cheaters always come up with a sophisticated justification for their cheating. However, cheating is cheating so I’m not sure why folks are so caught up on being the morally superior in their immoral actions.

Women, especially, try to fix the situation. We wonder what we’ve done to drive him to the arms of another woman. We struggle to think of ways to bring him back.

Spying, calling around, interrogating or even threatening the other woman – senseless hunt to prove what is already obvious: the relationship is broken.

Yeah, the other woman must be really evil to steal your man, but that is really not the point. She is not the one who committed to you, who promised to be true to you, and then cheated on you. Even more importantly, if it wasn’t her it would be someone else.

So why do people cheat?

A person who cheats has relationship issues of commitment, or they are no longer satisfi ed or stimulated to have sex with their current partner. Or they like various sex or the edge of illicit sex.

Others stray to remember what it is to be desirable. They are missing something in their current relationship. Often it comes down to sex for men, companionship for women.

If you were completely in love and happy, you would have no reason to jeopardise your relationship for a fi ve-minute fl ing with the girl next door? We tend to think fi rst about the family, thinking, “If he will stop, I can get through this.” But what if he doesn’t stop?

To be or not to be….

A person can’t come between two happy people. The two people in a relationship create space for the third wheel to come in. Cheating is vile and disrespectful.

When you are cheated on, it feels like your entire universe crumbles around you. The most underrated benefi t of cheating is that it opens your eyes to a relationship that is no longer nurturing your needs. So you are obligated to fix it (which is a hard paper) or to quit.

The statements, comments, or opinions expressed through the use of New Vision Online are those of their respective authors, who are solely responsible for them, and do not necessarily represent the views held by the staff and management of New Vision Online.

New Vision Online reserves the right to moderate, publish or delete a post without warning or consultation with the author.Find out why we moderate comments. For any questions please contact digital@newvision.co.ug

  • mail
  • img
blog comments powered by Disqus
Also In This Section
If Jesus were living today?
What do you think he would be doing? Would he be a TV preacher wearing bling and speaking with a slurred American accent?...
Maternal deaths: Shortage  of midwives derailing fight
People at Kabale University are still reeling from the death of their lecturer. The health workers at Kabale Hospital live in regret, wishing they could have done more....
Poverty forces refugees into prostitution
Lack of basic necessities is one of the factors that have forced some refugees into the prostitution....
Wakiso girls have never heard of family planning
Nakalya village, Nakungube parish Masulita sub-county in Wakiso district, the rate of teenage mothers is high....
More US moms stay home to look after children
More mothers in the United States are staying home, but the increase is linked more to unemployment and demographic changes than to choice, a study published Tuesday suggested....
Vector-borne diseases: The plague affecting Ugandans
As Uganda joins the rest of the World to mark World Health Day, vector control remains a serious challenge...
WIll the national ID registration process be completed in the scheduled 4 months timeframe?
Can't Say
follow us
subscribe to our news letter